Today, I got tasered by a cop. It was his second day on the job. My crime? Sneezing during a sobriety test. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Takes one to know one
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Ouchies
Today, I got tased, with the same TASER I bought my girlfriend to use on people trying to rob her. FML
Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML
Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML
Today, I was put in lockup for accidentally scaring the officer by lifting my hand to scratch my head. FML
Appropriate force
Today, I'm recovering from being pepper-sprayed, beat with a baton and Tased, and arrested for assault. I'm a bouncer and was trying to remove a drunk asshole from the bar when the police showed up. FML
Oops.
Today, within 24 hours at my new security job, I accidentally tasered the head of security in the groin, causing him to piss himself. FML
What did you expect?
Today, as a joke, I hopped in the front seat of a police cruiser and took a cute selfie while the officer was talking to someone on the sidewalk. A minute later, he dragged me to the ground and arrested me. Um… what? FML
Today, I got pulled over heading home from college. My car was full of my stuff from moving out, and I couldn't reach the glove box. I told the cop this, and asked if he wanted me to go around to the passenger side to get my paperwork. He agreed. When I got out of the car, he pepper sprayed me. FML
Hogs gone wild
Today, I got pulled over by a cop. Since my window wasn't working, I opened the door, causing him to run towards me with a drawn gun. He then had a go at me with his night stick. After realizing my window was broken, he laughed and let me off with a warning. FML
Top comments
The_Hitdude 12
Cop: I'm gonna need you to walk on the line, son. OP: Sir, I swear I'm not dru--ATCHOO! Cop: We've got a fighter! *Zap Zap* This is how most cops behave anyway. I see a promotion in his future.
bobbeta30 14
My dad once saw a naked man with a spear running around a park get tazed.
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Comments (91)
PYLrulz 17
#10 - Agreed. Most cops out there are legit good, and do what they can to "Serve and Protect", but there are those out there that were probably... A. High School bullies that needed an outlet to continue their bullying... B. The bullied that blossomed late, and instead of using that to do good, they use it to "get back at the world" or C. The corruptable, which can be found on any job.
poohappens26 0
Bahahahahaha am I the only one that had the hangover movie flashback? FYL
Michael_92 20
Hopefully his last day on the job as well.
Sai_Run614 7
lol the new way of saying god bless you.
divadro102 16
Ahhhhh good memories. I forgot about that but remembered the exact way it was said and then watched the video. There was no need to tase him and there certainly was no need to stop his questions. FFS Bush had a shoe thrown at him
divadro102 16
That smiley face contradicts your hahas. That type of sneeze is the worst. Nostrils flare up, eyes feel like they're ejecting, and your throat seems to have grown pins and needles. And the thunderous clap resonates in your ears and all you can think is HOLY SHIT!
crazykid300 6
Ha
ttttttyyy 0
3- *starts to walk, then sneeze, OP gets zapped.
johngaltmovement 8
File for assault! Jkjk
kalbrek009 20
File a complaint with the office for unnecessary "use of excessive force", that cop was a douchebag in need of suspension & ask that they subpoena the cops in-dash video to prove your case...as long as that's how it really happened.