Today, I got a Brazilian wax in anticipation of becoming intimate for the first time this weekend with a man I have dated for a few weeks. I'm so sore it hurts just to walk. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I attempted to wax my "lady area". It hurt more than losing my virginity. FML
Today, I tried waxing for the first time. At first it felt like I'd dipped my balls in a furnace. Now I can't even feel them. FML
Today, I tried shaving my bikini area for the first time. I ended up cutting myself several times. I now have impressive razor burn, and it's incredibly painful to even wear pants. FML
Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML
Today, being tired of all the shrubbery growing “downstairs”, I decided to give my lady bits a good waxing. So, naturally, I now have a tiny tear in my right labia and I'm scratching my itchy buttcrack with an old toothbrush. FML
Today, I tried giving myself a bikini wax for the first time, and I'm pretty sure I didn't do it right. Now I'm laying on my couch with a wet rag and ice inbetween my legs. FML
Today, I shaved my legs and armpits for the first time in 6 weeks. Unfortunately, I didn't have a hot date, I just had my yearly gyno exam. FML
Today, I got a bikini wax. They said it wouldn't hurt too badly, and that it would just sting. My friend heard me screaming from all the way down the hall in the waiting room. FML
Today, I got a wax to be sexy for my date, but the whole area came up in this nasty rash with bumps and white spots, nasty as hell. When I told him sex was off the table for a few days, he stopped being charming, spent most of the night on his phone then left early with a bad excuse. FML
Today, I woke up with a sore clitoris. I haven't had sex with my boyfriend for weeks, but I did masturbate yesterday. I guess I can't get horny without feeling pain afterwards. FML
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Top comments
Shadowvoid 33
Well if it was done improperly, it could hurt a brazillion times more. I hope you feel better OP
Schala360 27
Guess you got ****** in more ways than one
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Comments (90)
Miss_Mandi 29
Well that discourages me from ever getting one. Laser hair removal instead.
iAmPaul 49
Sore because of the wax or the intimacy that ensued? ;)
Blue_Black_fml 21
There's a cream called "No Scream Cream" that you can put on 45 minutes before waxing. It numbs the area, taking away 80% of the waxing pain!
ruthi666 23
I suggest in the future you find a place that uses hard wax as opposed to strip wax. Hard wax is applied thickly and removed with the fingers of the esthetician. I don't know where in CA you're from but if you plan on waxing in the future, maybe see if there's a European Wax Center close to you. They use a hard wax they call "comfort wax" which really makes a difference. For now, anti-inflammatory creams and perhaps ibuprofen for the pain.
PhilMeUp 13
Ask him if he can kiss it better for you.
tamesenicole 27
Just shave it. That's what I do. Why would you get something that hurts on your face (waxed eyebrows) on your "no no" spot? Never makes sense to me smh oh well
marcranger 29
I have the same argument about razors in the no-no spot, actually!
mahaliah17 9
You have dated him for a few weeks...and you already wanna have sex with him?....
limabeans101029 21
Yes. She clearly stated that in the FML. There's nothing wrong with that. Move along now.
WhoCouldIBe 11
Men just wanna get on the green, we don't mind going through the rough
pike1346 3
Well, it may hurt, but good for you on tryouts mg to look sexy for your man. Thumbs up!
disnerd4 14
I guess on a scale of one to ten, the pain would be a...Brazilian. ;) (sorry)