Today, I found out that my new roommate likes to put candy on the floor, let ants crawl all over it, and eats it. Ants and all. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found ants all over my chocolate, but I'm so addicted that I just wiped them off and ate it anyway. FML
Today, my new room-mate moved in. She spent over an hour obsessively searching the place for god knows what kind of secret recording devices, and now aggressively demands that I taste-test all of her pre-prepared meals to make sure they're not poisoned. FML
Today, I came back to my apartment to see that my roommate had left out bread, deli meat, and cheese on the counter, so I made myself a sandwich. When she came back, she informed me that she found bugs in the fridge and took out all the food she thought would be contaminated. FML
Today, I moved into college and met my new roommate. Not fifteen minutes later, she had told me about the fungus on her feet, and what happens when she forgets to take her anti-psychotic medication, all while picking at her nose and eating the spoils. FML
Today, I woke up to my creepy new roommate licking my cheek. FML
Today, a colony of ants announced that they'd moved into my bedroom closet as I went to get dressed for work. FML
Today, when I got back to my dorm, I found a trail of ants trying to shove a dead roach into a power outlet. The front desk insists that there is no pest problem. FML
Today, I got a new roommate in the dorms. When I got back to my room, I could smell her feet before I even opened my door. FML
Today, I found thousands of ants in a secret nest in an unused corner of my apartment. They were feeding on the baking mix I forgot in a box from moving in two months ago, and the queen has been laying her eggs on my wireless router. FML
Today, I found out my roommate thinks the sink is an appropriate place to wash his junk. FML
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Top comments
MDoremis 38
Mmm, protein.
sparkledoge 29
I didn't know Bear Grylls had a roommate !
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Comments (43)
cheyluvsturtles 30
well at least your roommate doesn't let the ants crawl all over and put it back in your stuff.
MDoremis 38
Mmm, protein.
Lilo4life 26
Uhh... Positives are its nutritious and there are less ants in your home after he's eaten them?
SaltLord 10
That's disgusting. Mold and bacteria can form up on food and it's unhealthy to live in a space like that. He could get really sick from that. Perhaps you can work something out or tell him to stop? Just work things out, OP.
moniculkin 19
Must be crunchyyyyy
manofmerr 27
I'm kinda wondering if op ever tried it. Maybe it's good? There are some candys with ants in them.
Rababco 29
That quite a bit different though. It's one thing to buy candy with ants in it, it's another thing to leave candy out for ants to eat and then eating both the candy and ants. The candy attracts more ants then the roommate can eat and now OP and the roommate have an ant problem. Plus, the candy ends up covered in germs and dirt. It can get stuck to the carpet if the apartment has carpet and OP could accidentally step in it. It's way grosser than buying candy with ants inside it. If the roommate likes eating candy and ants than they should buy candy that already ants in it.
manofmerr 27
True though that is, what he's doing is free:) We'll just ignore all the unknowns, such as where the ants have been, what lovely germs they might have,and what may or may not be on the floor. Although i could also make a argument that the roomate has pica, so theres always that.
im_teekay 7
Good source of protein...
bre88 18
Are you sure your roommate isn't secretly an anteater?
sparkledoge 29
I didn't know Bear Grylls had a roommate !
momogal 22
Ants in honey was a delicacy in ancient Rome.
momogal 22
Maybe he's doing that, too. Next thing we'll hear about him will be that he's eating dormice lol.