Today, I found out that my girlfriend hasn't really been "researching" for work on the Internet; she's actually been tweeting the same pathetic plea to a guy from One Direction asking him to "follow" her. She's 29. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I stumbled upon my girlfriend's Twitter account that I didn't know existed. A recent entry states that living with me is pathetic; "it's just that the current economical situation doesn't leave her with many options." FML
Today, I found out that the girl I've been dating online for over three months is actually a very bored 14-year-old boy. FML
Today, I was online dating and a girl from high school messaged me. Thinking she might have matured since we're now in our 40's, I messaged back. She then said it was a joke and that I'm still a desperate, pathetic nerd trying to score with the hottest girl in class. FML
Today, my girlfriend got a Twitter account. Now she won't stop hashtagging everything she sends me. FML
Today, I noticed that my girlfriend only texts me when she needs help with her homework. FML
Today, my girlfriend posted “Alexa, play 'Flowers' by Miley Cyrus” as her Facebook status, all because I didn’t return her 14 missed calls. Apparently, taking an online proctored exam, which required absolute concentration counts as “talking to other women.” FML
Today, it appears that my girlfriend visited an internet web page called "How to confess to having an affair." FML
Today, out of pure boredom, I created a Twitter account. Looking for pages to follow, I found out that my long-distance boyfriend is actually someone's husband. A month ago he posted a picture of himself and "The love of his life", wishing her a happy 30th birthday. FML
Today, after a small fight with my girlfriend, I started to miss her, so I typed her name into Google on a whim. Surprisingly, I find a link to a blog in which the owner describes his ongoing effort to seduce my girl. During times she told me she was alone. Thanks babe. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that she wasn't really in love with me. She got that advice from an internet survey. FML
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Top comments
mpj13 8
I think your relationship is going in the wrong direction.
daniel_0084 14
Sucks OP. it's probably just a phase, she'll get over it. (I Hope) make sure she eventually tries to get a job
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Comments (90)
TiggyBonkers 32
At least it's not Justin Bieber!
fantasyworld 39
Tell her that what she's doing is creepy.
criley221 19
Unfortunately, OP, horrible music taste is all ages. Hang in there! Or dump her, I'd go with the later...I'm not sure she is worth saving...
AviatorCraft 11
Well walk up to her and simply say "To bad their done for a long time or maybe forever now hope you enjoy the Long Way Down at the End Of the Day" she'll get the references