Today, I finally figured out why my mechanic was so cheap; he wanted to sleep with me. After I politely declined, he charged me regular price plus extra for "humiliating" him. He's 60. I just recently turned 18. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML
Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML
Today, excited that I finally got a place of my own, I invited my boyfriend over for a sexy sleep over. He told me his mom doesn't want him sleeping over. He's 21 years old. FML
Today, as I often do, I had sex in my old car. I'm 25, my boyfriend is 28 and we're still living with our parents. FML
Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML
Today, I was at work on a smoke break. I work at a truck stop, and it was around 2 a.m. Some old man pulled in and asked me if I would like to join him for some dinner. I said no, and told him I was working. He replied, "How much do you charge?" Apparently, even in sweats I look like a hooker. FML
Today, a man asked me on a date. It's been so long, I accepted immediately. He began quoting what seemed like random numbers to me, and it took me a few minutes to work out what he meant. Not only was I mistaken for a prostitute, I'm also worth, at most, $60. FML
Today, my mom came home unusually early from work and walked in on me hooking up with a guy. What made it more embarrassing is the fact that I’m 19 and my hookup is 52. FML
Today, as I was fueling my truck, I was asked out to dinner by a 65-year-old retiree. I'm 25. He stormed off and called me a bitch for politely turning him down. FML
Today, I had to take my horribly misogynistic grandad to get his car repaired. After it was done, he realised the repair had been done by a female mechanic, so he refused to pay or leave until a “proper mechanic” checked over his car to make sure she hadn’t fucked it up. FML
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Top comments
hannahtaskey 9
Horny old man...
borntoperform 14
Bow chicka wow wow
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Comments (184)
milou_fml 6
He probably figured that since he gave you such a good deal on his parts so you should return the favor.. it's slim pickings for a 60 year old mechanic!
WOLFEYES72 2
Sounds like pedobear is on the loose.
GogoTheGreat 12
Sue him.
dreamering 16
Get a hammer and break his stick shift.
amuck 0
but if he was younger you would have slept with him right? cause it seems like the age thing is your only problem... more like **** his life... should have at least gave him a show to at least get down to half price :)
DjeePee 25
The age thing also seems like a very big problem to me. But it could be the start of a classic ****.
diamond_d_ 6
you are now 18 and should realize that people are not nice to you just because. they are nice to you because you have something they want or there is something you can do for them. Besides with the money you could have saved you got wasted and drank 60 yr old mechanic into a i could have done worse. welcome to reality. wake up this is the real world and it has a slogan... ass gas or cash. nothing is free. sorry if you are offended but hopefully you will question someones motives when they are trying to help you. and be cautious when some one you barely knows starts saying we. its a con to get you think they are on your side trying to help as if they are in the same situation as you are and by helping you their problems are solve too
hairguitarhero 5
Wow. If OP is anything like me, after the third line I decided it was too much to read. But I'm sure there was a nice message in there. Good day!
prettygrlwrock 9
wow your a prostitute are'nt you
kevineleven21 0
you should tell the police that he's a sex offender
mikkiMAYHEM 8
Maybe you could have gotten away with "I'll think about it" or "We'll see"?
AmazingAngelina5 5
What a creeper!
samicna 4
report him to the better business bureau!