Today, I finally figured out why my mechanic was so cheap; he wanted to sleep with me. After I politely declined, he charged me regular price plus extra for "humiliating" him. He's 60. I just recently turned 18. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML
Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML
Today, excited that I finally got a place of my own, I invited my boyfriend over for a sexy sleep over. He told me his mom doesn't want him sleeping over. He's 21 years old. FML
Today, as I often do, I had sex in my old car. I'm 25, my boyfriend is 28 and we're still living with our parents. FML
Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML
Today, I was at work on a smoke break. I work at a truck stop, and it was around 2 a.m. Some old man pulled in and asked me if I would like to join him for some dinner. I said no, and told him I was working. He replied, "How much do you charge?" Apparently, even in sweats I look like a hooker. FML
Today, a man asked me on a date. It's been so long, I accepted immediately. He began quoting what seemed like random numbers to me, and it took me a few minutes to work out what he meant. Not only was I mistaken for a prostitute, I'm also worth, at most, $60. FML
Today, my mom came home unusually early from work and walked in on me hooking up with a guy. What made it more embarrassing is the fact that I’m 19 and my hookup is 52. FML
Today, as I was fueling my truck, I was asked out to dinner by a 65-year-old retiree. I'm 25. He stormed off and called me a bitch for politely turning him down. FML
Today, I had to take my horribly misogynistic grandad to get his car repaired. After it was done, he realised the repair had been done by a female mechanic, so he refused to pay or leave until a “proper mechanic” checked over his car to make sure she hadn’t fucked it up. FML
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Top comments
hannahtaskey 9
Horny old man...
borntoperform 14
Bow chicka wow wow
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Comments (184)
kidcanada 4
Men will usually have sex with women reguardless their age
portcaveman 5
that is just weird
little_metalbear 0
fyl, he could be your grandpa!
stewy78 2
What a bunch of squares
Calyx_fml 22
Today, the woman I have given hundreds of dollars of free service to refused to service me. Then she got all upset when I tried to recover my expenses. FML
momo1972 3
then sleep with him
daviddgaf 3
Ill Be Your Mechanic For You;)p. hahahaa
lil_lala209 5
should have turned him down after you paid...
ashleighmef 7
Diaper sniper!!!
Bcfrmkc816 17
should have slept with him it's still sex regardless of age and you probably would have enjoyed it