Today, I finally felt comfortable enough to fart in front of my boyfriend for the first time. He went quiet, got up and left in his car. I haven't heard from him in 4 hours. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
Today, I farted myself awake, in a car full of my boyfriend's family. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming, "What the fuck?!" FML
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
Today, I farted in front of my husband for the first time in 26 years. He told our kids over email, and now they won't shut up about it. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
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Top comments
TCRII 30
Must have been a really stinky one.
RichardPencil 32
I think he’s heard enough. Apparently, your passing of gas gave him a change of fart.
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Comments (13)
TCRII 30
Must have been a really stinky one.
Weslea Sanchez 12
Had a date start like this, don't remember how it ended, but I definitely know this is how it started.
Trinity Fenwick 7
what a buthole, does he expect you to be a 'stepford wife'? you're human, not a robot. hell, even jlo farts
Sinshine 28
Oh no! Not J.Lo!
RichardPencil 32
I think he’s heard enough. Apparently, your passing of gas gave him a change of fart.
Razell 13
Did you at least say "excuse me" after letting it rip? Because that would have been the polite thing to do. Maybe he left because you were rude.
Elisabetha Aarron 18
Even if they didn't say excuse my leaving and ignoring them for hours on end is childish and immature
Jackey 29
Don't think that's the smell of love.
griddy24 18
Aw yeah, some guys just hate finding out that girls are also human.
Sinshine 28
Yea but I'd assume he's older than 12, having a car and all.
core01 30
OPs name is Ted.
Iamthebanzai22 21
A real gentleman would have handled that rather differently..
thisisbutaname 38
He would have farted too to make her feel comfortable
riley873 21
*him
loliloveoniichan 14
i'd be disgusted too. imo you only fart on privacy.
shannon2348 14
I guess I'm old school but I think that's disgusting. I could never do that in front of my boyfriend. ydi
Elisabetha Aarron 18
They deserve it for doing a normal bodily function? I really hope you are a troll.