Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a dutch oven, with my own fart. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were setting up a desktop PC we'd bought second-hand. In the middle of this, he stopped, frowning, sniffed the air a few times and said we'd better give it a good dust, because it smelt like burning. I'd just farted. FML
Today, during an argument that he couldn't win, my boyfriend farted in a glass, covered it with his hand, ran to me, and let it go it right in front of my nose. FML
Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
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Top comments
lissn 0
At least you don't have to suffer too much when he farts in his sleep
pattheaninal 9
So if he farted the scent of a delicious aroma, then his shit must be a butterball turkey dinner, right?
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Comments (83)
lissn 0
At least you don't have to suffer too much when he farts in his sleep
Gorsbug823 0
sicko
G0v3nat0r 7
Hey it's true
Antivirus_fml 0
FArt... yum yum, sexy! :p
blkmagick 0
Nice to know he has nice smelling farts.
Cjw1220 0
One time, I farted, and it totally smelled like bacon.
Kingdutch 3
WIN!! Atleast you won't have to complain when he farts next to you.
crazytoaster 2
Bottle it and sell it as "Essence of Cuisine" or some shit.
iJamesJamesable 0
lol
sun_babe 0
That is so revolting. Yuck.
Sakata_Gintoki 0
It could be brand I think. "The most delicious fart in the world"" And attract ppl to smell. 5 dollar once. :D
Jimboom 12
Mmm. Yea. Suck it down you dirty fartsniffer. ;)
pattheaninal 9
So if he farted the scent of a delicious aroma, then his shit must be a butterball turkey dinner, right?
sharon_ellj 0
Eww, and i thought farts were either odorless or stinky or really stinky... EWW...
wellinever 5
So which bit is the FML? The fact that you liked the lingering aroma of his fart or the fact that you told him?