Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old shirts to the girl who's stalking me. This explains why I got a note that read, "I have your scent, now I can track you." FML
Today, my car went missing. My sister constantly asks to borrow it, so I called her and asked if she had it. She swore blind that she didn't, so I called the cops and reported it stolen. They soon caught her driving the stolen vehicle. She blames me and is now telling everyone I set her up to be arrested. FML
Today, I found out my sister has been "borrowing" my adult toys and putting them back without washing them well enough. How did I find out? I came back positive for an STI. FML
Today, I found ladies knee-high socks that weren't mine. I don't even own a pair of knee-high socks. After bickering back and forth with my boyfriend, he said, "Actually now that you mention it, I thought they were yours and I put them there." FML
Today, I found a thong at my boyfriend's house. When I confronted him about it, he panicked and claimed it was his mom's. Right. FML
Today, I was staying over at my boyfriend's house, sleeping in his sister's room while she is away at college. I left my necklace on her dresser. When I came back, it was gone. His mother saw it there and thought it was her daughter's necklace. She hid it so I wouldn't "steal it". FML
Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML
Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML
Today, I found out who's been stealing clothes from me during swim practice. She called me a liar, despite wearing one of my sweaters, which has my initials stitched into it. FML
Today, I found out that my ex-boyfriend stole a pair of my underwear, and still wears them to this day. FML
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Top comments
Milk_Emperor 8
Hahaha, I don't know who got the shittiest end of the stick: you, your boyfriend or your sister. That'll be some awkward family conversations. Good luck.
pcentral 17
I want a gentleman in the streets, but a freak in the bed...?
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Comments (188)
kmikelg 1
Maybe he went to see or was part of the rocky horror picture show!
superfail77 8
Are you the same shoe size as him? Always good to have someone to share shoes with ;)
graphicstyle7 17
If he's a great boyfriend in other ways, why stress? Be an excellent girlfriend and let him know it's ok. Unless that kind of thing totally freaks you out. Guess it takes all kinds.
beclaurela 18
I'm sorry, but that's hilarious as shit. Let's hope he makes an attractive cross dresser.
shadexilmaendu 4
That's kind of sad. :/ so what if he likes to cross dress? A hundred years or so ago OP would be considered a cross dresser for wearing pants. We have equality now. But if a man wears women's clothes there's something wrong with him and you dump his ass? So it's a little weird. Life's a little weird. But I can't imagine dumping someone for the shallow ass reasons I see on FML constantly.
sicksadworld1317 30
So, dress her up in one of your outfits, tie her to the bed with the fishnets, and explore your Dominant side. This could have it's perks, ya know :)
redtigerlily 5
You dumped him because he wears womens clothing. I bet he didn't think to dump you when you wore his clothing.
Cypherrr 13
Do not jump to conclusions yet. My best guy friend is completely straight and has a secret fetish of cross dressing. We have feelings for each other also. Have a serious talk about it with your boyfriend. It doesn't always mean he goes the other way. Sometimes mean are actually curious about it. It also doesn't mean he wants to transition into a woman.
carminecris89 13
No it doesnt mean that, but he probably will be trying to bring that into any kind of sex life they have, and it's probably not a turn on and will most likely completely turn off op. that's a problem. He should have told her, and he should have done it as soon as they got serious.
ShesAPistol 0
you know how to pick em OP
SimplyEerb 3
Well, does he have good taste? That's the most important question.