Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old shirts to the girl who's stalking me. This explains why I got a note that read, "I have your scent, now I can track you." FML
Today, my car went missing. My sister constantly asks to borrow it, so I called her and asked if she had it. She swore blind that she didn't, so I called the cops and reported it stolen. They soon caught her driving the stolen vehicle. She blames me and is now telling everyone I set her up to be arrested. FML
Today, I found out my sister has been "borrowing" my adult toys and putting them back without washing them well enough. How did I find out? I came back positive for an STI. FML
Today, I found ladies knee-high socks that weren't mine. I don't even own a pair of knee-high socks. After bickering back and forth with my boyfriend, he said, "Actually now that you mention it, I thought they were yours and I put them there." FML
Today, I found a thong at my boyfriend's house. When I confronted him about it, he panicked and claimed it was his mom's. Right. FML
Today, I was staying over at my boyfriend's house, sleeping in his sister's room while she is away at college. I left my necklace on her dresser. When I came back, it was gone. His mother saw it there and thought it was her daughter's necklace. She hid it so I wouldn't "steal it". FML
Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML
Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML
Today, I found out who's been stealing clothes from me during swim practice. She called me a liar, despite wearing one of my sweaters, which has my initials stitched into it. FML
Today, I found out that my ex-boyfriend stole a pair of my underwear, and still wears them to this day. FML
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Top comments
Milk_Emperor 8
Hahaha, I don't know who got the shittiest end of the stick: you, your boyfriend or your sister. That'll be some awkward family conversations. Good luck.
pcentral 17
I want a gentleman in the streets, but a freak in the bed...?
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Comments (188)
dirton89 7
A drag queen as a bf? That's a chance to meet rupaul...better take that shit...besides y'all can help each in the morning with what y'all gonna wear
BauerMegan 31
...y'all.
subwaysurfers 13
I think she already broke up with him. Look at her username...
Bpwoods 6
I had not noticed that until you mentioned it, thank you sir.
Michael_92 20
It's funny, I usually never look at the username until I see a comment about it.
mrnuleef 7
Now you know just how far his boundaries lie, so either A: you've got a whole new world of sexual exploration. B: you end it if you don't wanna support his hobby C: you just got yourself a new gay best friend.
hwkfan1 10
Unless that other person happens to be a guy...
rsunshine2020 13
Who happens to be your boyfriend...
klatt 8
O my
Bpwoods 6
Saying "O my" is one thing, but not having the decency to spell "oh" correctly in such a short comment is just sad...
SqueakyChipmunk 22
23) Gawd. Yay, another Usher reference!
ElmoSaysSquishy 28
My boyfriend crossdresses It's hardly the end of the world. The sex is pretty fun.
Random017 7
That's just wrong... He should have asked before taking your makeup.
Pandacupcakelove 26
Oh my... Well, you should definitely discuss this with him! Hey, if it works out for you two, you can share makeup! :D
momolee 4
Good makeup is expensive. Even if OP was OK with him wearing makeup and dressing up as a girl. She should dump him for stealing.
SadIife 6
I hate to break it to you, but your boyfriend is most probably a tranny....
Michael_92 20
Thank you, I would have never guessed that using my common sense.
ElmoSaysSquishy 28
Don't blame him, girl clothes are nicer anyway.
TheDrudgeChild 4
If you think all cross-dressers are either gay or transsexual, you may want to actually meet some. The majority are straight men.