Heather
Newport News, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I discovered my children had found my vibrator and buried it in the cat's litter box. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Okemos, United States 🌶️ Spicy
What was I thinking?
Today, I realized that the only place my missing vibrator can be is at the house of the people I just dogsat for. In their spare room. Which also serves as their kids' playroom. FML
crazygirl
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I realized that the vibrator we bought got sent to his parents house. He picked it up from them, brought it home, and we discovered that they had already opened the package. They even tried to hide the evidence by re-taping it. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
How very dare you?
Today, I came home from work and found my sister using my vibrator in my own bed. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Oh no.
Today, while cleaning out my daughter's closet, I found my missing dildo. It's a mold of my husband's penis. FML
go fuck myself
Tampa, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I can't decide what's worse: the fact that my mother found my vibrator or that, as a prank, she replaced it with a realistic tarantula replica. She won't tell me where it is. FML
Mygawdwhy
Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML
Anonymous
May be
Today, while I was at my job as senior care, I was in a client's home vacuuming the carpet and found a very used vibrator that belonged to his wife. It wasn't clean. FML
Anonymous
Exminster, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, after assuming I'd been scammed, I finally found the vibrator I ordered over 2 months ago. It was in my mom's bedside cabinet. FML
Buzzing Confusion
Chicago, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Us neither, dude
Today, I found out that the mother of my children named her vibrator after me. We are together and have not had sex in over 18 months. I have no idea what to do with this information. FML
VCR
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found my underwear in my brother's pillow as well as my vibrator and Victoria's Secret magazines. FML
Top comments
strawberrywine22 30
Trust me, it could be wore. My son took the "rocket ship" he found to school for show and tell. My daughter used it to massage her grandmother's feet.
gonad_gobbler 1
You have smart kids! They knew vibrators and ******* go together!
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Comments (66)
lilcuz69 16
You still gonna use it?
xXxIracebethxXx 14
Well, cat piss is better than lube...
xXxIracebethxXx 14
Well, cat piss is better than lube...
mylifesucks_fml 1
maybe they thought it was a cat toy? or a treasure? just say "no no, you guys have toys and this one is Jimmy's special toy!"
doctorhook86 25
What's the problem? The kids put the vibrator with the pussy...
Oreohugzpenny 4
The cat will have fun with that!!!!
shjenn 7
HAHAHAHAHA! that's disgusting but so hilarious. poor cat... woulda freaked out if it started vibrating while it was buried :(
efemel94 7
Wells dogs like chewing on a bone so why not cats?
domking1315 20
#30, that wouldve made a much better first comment haha
reddawn1985 12
Why would they touch that? Grotty
alex1432 9
great comment my friend
LadiDi_fml 10
Time to get a new vibrator
anoellem 1
Or just get a new vibrator?
iStrukk 7
Thats not the right pussy... ;)
pxndiieinsanity 6
They got the right idea,at least. ;p
domking1315 20
So you would disown a child for a vibrator? What kind of trade off is that?
Mioko_fml 6
Why did 3 get many thumb down though 59 said the same thing but got thumbed up. What the hell?
ThisBiatchFMLs 5
Theres such thing as sexual toy cleaner
sporty1200xlr 6
96 - that's because the people are imagining her use it. You get a visual picture to the comment.
yourlifesucksHA 14
Damn right!!
paolayupp 6
Well that's a shitty situation.
coldashell 23
That was so deep and meaningful.
la_gata_0716 5
You know how many people used that already? It's not funny anymore. Trust me!
Rectumended 3
Restrain from making pussy joke. Restrain from making pussy joke.
You_Screwed_Up 7
Now it will pleasure a different pussy.
coldashell 23
50, the word you are looking for is REFRAIN.
Fuzzymonkey2013 7
Ha
rcgirl2 11
How original..
LegalyWhite 7
55- we all understood what he was trying to say
Monkeyone 0
please wash it...or just throw it away.
nadnerbz 6
Why would you bury it where your cat relieves itself?
Awahso 25
Because one is a place of relief while the other is an object of relief ;)
strawberrywine22 30
The key word there is AND. Her kids found it AND buried it in the litter box.
nadnerbz 6
Whoops, I read that wrong. I thought she hid it there, my bad.
ShyAnn29 15
Don't feel bad 24, I did the same thing!
maz255 10
Dumbasses...
ShyAnn29 15
84, we just read it wrong, that doesn't mean we are dumbasses!
SpruceDread4578 13
Yes it does.
SarcasticUnicorn 9
Maybe you should find another hiding spot.
Daffodilly 14
No shit
Inheritance 10
You don't say?
Monkeyone 0
please wash it...or just throw it away.
Forlorn420 9
Now it will be purrfect.. Yea lame
mpsteve137 15
Haha it must smell terrible if they thought to put it there
bertman21 5
What's worse the fact that they found it, or that it's in the litter box?
iamabamf 17
43-You've cat to be kitten me right meow. Oh, you're not lion? You're fur real? I had to paws and think about cat one.
Byahhh 3
Whichever pussy got residue on it, it's bound to smell unless you wash it anyway.
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
110- WIN XD
lovelife1995 1
Right
TheApocalypse 5
Wow. What a shitty situation. Find a better hiding spot OP.
evilplatypus 39
You said what post 2 and post 7 said. Two plus seven equals nine, your post number. I smell a conspiracy...
jjessen 20
Lol
antmanzero 8
@21 Holy shit...IT'S THE GOVERNMENT MAN, THEY'RE OUT TO GET US! O.O *head explodes
cutemonsterx3 6
And his name is theapocolypse Dun dun duunnnnnn!
cutemonsterx3 6
TheApocalypse**
strawberrywine22 30
Trust me, it could be wore. My son took the "rocket ship" he found to school for show and tell. My daughter used it to massage her grandmother's feet.
strawberrywine22 30
worse* Typo, oops!
Awahso 25
That would be a great story to tell your son in front of his friends when he turns 16 or so. The reaction would be priceless.
yoursucklives 36
maybe you should hide it better?
XxChioxX 0
Haha thats too funny...
duckiegirl21 10
Please tell me it was tossed after touching granny feet!
dude1122332 9
70, no it's proudly in my shrine.(:
Wicked361 8
Imagine what the teacher roughy when he/ she saw the "rocket ship"... O.o
randomguy309 1
Haha
SherBear133 7
How did u manage to let it get found twice?!
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
I would have loved to see the reaction on the teacher's face XD
gonad_gobbler 1
You have smart kids! They knew vibrators and ******* go together!
Dr_Kash 3
Hahaha .... The connection
HerrBawl 4
This is Egg Zachary what I was going to post.
BradTheBrony 19
Cats and vibrators... delicious chicken fetus spheres and Zack the Lego maniac... OH MY GOD I THINK I SEE THE CONNECTION!