Today, I discovered my 18 year old son has been peeing on the carpet when he is too lazy to get out of bed in the morning and blaming it on the cat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that I'd been wrong to constantly accuse next door's cat of peeing on my car every night. It was actually my 16-year-old son. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son figured out that if he takes his pull-up off and DOESN'T go on the potty, he can pee all over things. FML
Today, my 12 year-old step-child told me he’s been deliberately wetting - and sometimes crapping - the bed because he’s too lazy to get up, and knows it’s someone else’s problem to clean up after him. It’s been going on for years. FML
Today, I found out my son told his teachers that I make his brother Tom sleep on the floor, make him stay out of the house for long periods of time, and don't let him use the toilet. Tom is actually our cat. FML
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML
Today, after explaining to my four-year-old why our new puppy was peeing on things to mark his territory, my son decided to follow suit and pee all over our house. FML
Today, my is still peeing on the toilet seat and floor. When will it get better? My son is 18 years-old and apparently can’t aim in the toilet. I had to sit on the pee he left on the toilet seat the other day. FML
Today, my son pooped in his diaper and managed to somehow take it off without my knowledge. He then sat down on the carpet and imitated a dog with worms, all the way down the hallway, through the living room, and into my bedroom. FML
Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML
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Top comments
junaho 0
You should pee in his bed. Blame it on the cat.
ashole1990 10
my brother used to pee in a bottle when he didnt feel like getting up.... then he kept the bottles filled in a cabinet at least it isnt as disturbing as that haha but yeah, fyl. he's gross
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Comments (244)
worldjudge 0
you didn't punish him enough as a kid. bill him for the new carpet if he fails to pay, then simply let each of his friends in his life know what he does. he must respect property, and have some self-respect! He'll be posting on here soon enough.... My parent's told everyone I pee on the carpet then blame it on the cat, FML. hahaha
_THE_MASTER_ 0
so, swat him on the nose with a rolled up news paper, and then stick his nose in it. then tell him that if he's going to continue to act like a dog, you'll continue to train him like a dog. jorb well done.
_THE_MASTER_ 0
so, swat him on the nose with a rolled up newspaper, stick his nose in the piss, and then tell him that if he continues to act like a dog, you'll continue to treat and train him like a dog. also, some other ideas on here are not bad at all. definitely talk about it in front of all of his friends, and humiliate the shit out of him. that's leinient as hell. i would personally go with an old fashioned ass kicking to start off with, but it's your kid...
NonchalantSavant 0
I heard about a kid who did this same thing on a "This American Life" episode. He was blaming it on his senile grandmother 'cause he wanted his parents to put her in a home. They ended up taking his dog to the pound instead, because they didn't believe it was the grandmother. Karma and all that...
aed0219 0
Yeah... make him pay for a new one. And if he won't - he's 18! Kick his dumb ass out.
rustyrox 0
sounds like it's time to kick him out.. just be sure not to pay his deposite!
harveywallbanger 0
You deserve it for raising such a piece of shit.
warrenthewalrus 0
Am I the only one who thought of the Family Guy episode when Brian blamed Stewie for pissing on the carpet while reading this FML? :D
alertse 0
I did
scince220 0
I did too!
amandawins 0
I would guess that the kid has mental health issues. If you can't get out of bed to pee, there's something wrong with you.
soccergirl15_fml 0
That's nasty. What a lazy gross dumbass. I'd get rid of him hahah.