Today, I discovered a brown recluse spider in my house. Before I could smash it, it escaped under the door. Now I'm freaked out and wearing boots and gloves, clutching at my kittens and waiting for it to appear. My dad laughs everytime he walks past. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I saw a huge wolf spider in my room. It ran off and hid before I could kill it, but after two hours looking for it then giving up, I finally found it, with my foot, as I put on my shoes. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Today, I saw a scorpion crawling across the kitchen floor. While trying to swat it towards the middle of the floor to prevent it from escaping as I looked for something to kill it with, my cat came to investigate. Kitty thought I was playing with a new toy and joined in by batting the scorpion under the oven. I know it's plotting its revenge. FML
Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
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Top comments
Hiimhaileypotter 53
I don't blame you. Spiders are terrifying.
AGhost5445 25
Your dad is a brave man.
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Comments (155)
cuban777 0
Lol
raptorboy 1
I got bit by one and it was brutallllll. I had to go to the E.R. One night and they had to preform a surgery on me
doby199 6
Be careful I heard that they're poisonous
TomGouin 12
There's a myth that says that at any given time you have three spiders at least two meters from you. Have fun sleeping!
RBenjamin24 0
:/
PaulieXP 16
Look, he's crawling up my wall Black and hairy, very small Now he's up above my head Hanging by a little thread Boris the spider ...
bored_betty 1
:D Only other person I've come across that knows the lyrics to Boris the Spider!
KuuipoSays 1
It may not really be one. I was bitten by its cousin a hobo spider & learned a LOT about both. That are not as identifiable as most people think and MOST often people are wrong. Without finding it and taking it's NOT maimed carcass to a pro, you can't know.And, they are a 'recluse'. They don't wander. . Plus, spiders don't randomly bite people. You aren't food. It's when they are threatened like when trapped against you by clothing, etc. (how I was bitten). Shake out your clothes and relax. Also- they aren't interested in your bedding either. No food there.
kaeli2003 11
Ewww I hate bugs!!!
awepicdude 7
The same thing I happening to me right now
Daesh_fml 9
Life must suck being that scared of stupid things.
nerdistheword123 12
Ummmm..... you do know that brown recluse spiders are deadly venomous, right?