Today, I discovered a brown recluse spider in my house. Before I could smash it, it escaped under the door. Now I'm freaked out and wearing boots and gloves, clutching at my kittens and waiting for it to appear. My dad laughs everytime he walks past. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I saw a huge wolf spider in my room. It ran off and hid before I could kill it, but after two hours looking for it then giving up, I finally found it, with my foot, as I put on my shoes. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Today, I saw a scorpion crawling across the kitchen floor. While trying to swat it towards the middle of the floor to prevent it from escaping as I looked for something to kill it with, my cat came to investigate. Kitty thought I was playing with a new toy and joined in by batting the scorpion under the oven. I know it's plotting its revenge. FML
Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Hiimhaileypotter 53
I don't blame you. Spiders are terrifying.
AGhost5445 25
Your dad is a brave man.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (155)
SiriusBlack97 17
The chance of seeing a brown recluse spider outside of the immediate tropics about as likely as seeing a cow jump over the moon.
foreveriowa 16
spiders are a sign of a loved one watching over you
golfer_boi 10
Spiders aren't that scary...
SoultheWolf 19
I love spiders, whenever I see one I put it outside where it's safe. But if I see a brown recluse (alone with any other spider I know is poisonous) I immediately kill it without second thoughts. The brown recluse especially, has a toxin that literally eats at your flesh like acid, and if it isn't treated right away it, the person might have to get part of their body amputated. So yes, this is one spider to be afraid of. Look up brown recluse bites on google if you don't believe me...
chell1894 13
Spiders carry venom, not poison. Poison is something you ingest.
graphicstyle7 17
I know some people who have been bitten by that type of spider. They are nothing to laugh about or mess with. It can cause chunks of your flesh to die (very painfully) and have to be amputated. So, yeah, get an exterminator in there and do what you have to. I'd be very nervous too!
charvisioku 22
I had to research what a recluse spider is (I live in England, we never really get venomous spiders). I got to "potential necrosis" and had to stop. I can fully understand you being afraid for your kittens. I'd be pathetic if that thing came in my house, I'm not great with ordinary house spiders as it is. Yeuch...
sorrowsangel89 1
I totally feel u. I freaked out when I couldn't catch a black widow and ended up spraying the outside porch with $15 worth spider raid
skyeyez9 25
If you see one spider, there are dozens more lurking.
Felling 14
Oh god, googling 'brown recluse spider' was a terrible idea. I legit hope it never comes back for you sake, I know Id be like crying if I saw that ahah. D:
MaryPoppins88 14
That sucks a brown recluse bite is poisonous although they don't tend to bite unless their pressed up against a flat surface most people who have been bitten say they were putting on close or gloves