Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML
Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I snuck into the bathroom together at his house for a quickie. Just as we unzipped our pants, his step-dad knocked on the door. Panicking, I jumped into the closet to hide. When his step-dad came in, he went to put some towels away. In the closet. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML
Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML
Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML
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Top comments
misspulkadot24 17
That is so ******* disgusting. I'm never eating while reading FML again.
HooyoMacaan 7
Oh wow.. That's.. That's just nasty.. I thought folks just pissed in the shower. :/
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Comments (169)
buddy51 23
OP- You should comment your BF for his water conservation- why waste a flush when you can push that turd right on down the plughole? He's an environmental hero!!
AllegroRubato 16
Holy shit! I know some dudes like to pee in the shower, but this goes beyond all reason! I mean, that's not even convenient! It makes no sense!
TOSeller 2
Your bf is likely clinical obstipated and should go to the doctor. Could be a rectal intussusception or rectum/anal prolapse. In that case his intestines are loose, so he pushes them along with his poo :s Those patients are often to embarresed to see a doctor, and sometimes can only poop by.. taking it out with their hands. Doing this in a shower in stead of on an toilet is a way to rinse everything clean.
johnhjoker 3
That's the best thing I've ever read even though it probably didn't happen
Hawaii84 16
DUMP him... Pun intended
Dusty_Busters 15
What. The. ****.
katefleck77 17
well.. that's one way to turn down sex.
Christala 8
"Shit, Shower, Shave" refers to the routine, it never implies doing all 3 in the tub/showerstall. Gross! If I walked in on that, the man would have two choices: Therapy, or GTFO.
Webbdwebber 1
He doesn't always shit in the shower, but when he does, he stomps it down the drain.
MsFelicia47 4
That is beyound disgusting..I wanna throw up. I would def not be able look at him ever again without getting sick to my stomach. That poor gf of his!