Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML
Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I snuck into the bathroom together at his house for a quickie. Just as we unzipped our pants, his step-dad knocked on the door. Panicking, I jumped into the closet to hide. When his step-dad came in, he went to put some towels away. In the closet. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML
Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML
Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML
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Top comments
misspulkadot24 17
That is so ******* disgusting. I'm never eating while reading FML again.
HooyoMacaan 7
Oh wow.. That's.. That's just nasty.. I thought folks just pissed in the shower. :/
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Comments (169)
artinwords 14
Eww the toilet is RIGHT there why would someone do that?!
Lizzy500 16
Maybe the toilet was caked in used tampons? We need to hook these 2 piglets up, imagine the FML's they could produce together.
KiddNYC1O 22
Odd ritual.
Hamz1989 13
Just picturing that in my head scarred me for a while.
maz95 17
Well now you know the reason to any plumbing issues.
challan 19
Mmmm baby, joining me in the shower? Hot! Hold on a second, I'm almost done, then I'm all yours. When I lean you against the wall, you may not want to look down, some of last nights corn doesn't want to go down.
420Zombie 17
thank you for that even MORE vivid image in my mind than I already had -_-
DrewFluIngle 10
Dear god that's wrong to a whole new extent....
mitchiemoto 7
63 - Your profile picture fits your comment perfectly. (:
mitchiemoto 7
Sorry wrong person.
doodlecloud 27
Oh God that is so wrong. I know a lot of people pee in the shower, which I guess I kinda understand, but I will never understand why anyone would poop there. So he had to actually push it down, like with his hands? Gross.
tj4234 36
you're lucky your boyfriend isn't oscar pisorius
perdix 31
#18, after seeing your boyfriend handling a turd, you might prefer the Pistorius treatment.
obviousboy 8
HAHAHAHAHAA! FML Never disappoints.
HowieDoIt 21
Comments, however, do disappoint.
DrewFluIngle 10
Somehow I feel your picture fits your comment. :)
xmaximusx 12
Too Many Anal Retents now a days On This Site... I Say kcco
countryrose92 23
Idk whether to put YDI for intruding on his private time, you FYL because that's just nasty.
dontpanic_fml 32
Yes, I find gentlemen become quite upset at the intrusion of their private time when a women disrobes and joins them in the hot, steamy wet shower. It really is a put-off.
molzipan 16
My biggest question is how loudly do you usually undress that you felt it was important to mention that you undressed quietly? Although this whole FML raises some flags.
Zehla 7
LOL I am just imagining that scene in Tommy Boy where he is trying to change in the airplane restroom.
Seeingdouble 10
Dear god, you sound like my English teacher.
reflexion213 11
What the actual ****?! Nasty.
monocyte 4
What the virtual ****?! Disgusting.
btstig 11
What the philosophical ****? Abhorrent?
emmama19 15
What the genuine ****!? Revolting!
charvisioku 22
What the theoretical ****!? Appalling.