Today, I came home to the nanny passed out on the couch from too much alcohol, my 2-year-old alone and locked in the bathroom, and my house in a complete wreck. To top it off, it's the day my mother-in-law, who hates me, is coming to visit from New York. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML
Mommy dearest
Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML
Home sweet home
Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa, and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML
Family values
Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mother came over for a few hours. After she left I went to grab a drink, only to find that three bottles of expensive liquor were missing from our liquor cabinet. FML
Today, I visited my family. Over the course of 2 hours, my brother punched me, and my mom slapped me across the face after drinking way too much wine. When I started gathering my things to leave, my mom started crying about how I don't visit enough. FML
Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML
Parasite
Today, and since we've had our baby, my mother-in-law started coming round more often, then bringing her stuff to stay overnight, then started claiming she lived here, and got hysterical when we told her she doesn’t. I had to pick her up and place her outside while she punched me in the head repeatedly. FML
Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML
Today, my crazy drug-addict mother kicked me out of the house after siding with my crazy, drug-addict aunt, who'd just threatened to slit my throat. FML
Top comments
mamamiaaa_fml 12
Call the popo on the nanny for child endangerment who cares about the mother-in-law in a situation like this?
itsmygoodlife 4
Wow. Great nanny.
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Comments (155)
sknabc123 8
Clean up and when the mother in law gets there, wake her up in the middle of your visit
pandalover00 0
She is a bitch!
moomoomeow2 7
Wow I really hope it'll get better for you!
blockedusername 0
*BLOCKED*
nvo 6
Fire the nanny on the spot. The safety of your child is all that matters. Who cares about MIL or the apartment not being representable?
EarAcheMyEYE10 2
OP, throw her off the balcony!!!'
arvale8802 1
I def agree w #2
xgetxbentx 13
I would be more worried about your kid than your mother in law. As long as you do the right thing and file charges against the nanny for neglection and endangerment, she can't say shit that actually means anything. Seriously though, press charges, because if you don't, she's just going to do the same thing to other kids.
pdp_fml 21
I had hired a nanny for my children once. I hired her from an agency. She was horrible! She would lock herself in the bathroom for an hour to soak in the bath. She ate a lot of food and couldn't handle my children, who were in Jr. High School at the time. We fired her after only a month. I feel your pain Op.
desireev 18
Wow, OP. Did you fire her? I need a new nanny!