Today, I came home early from work, and caught my girlfriend with my best friend. I forgave her. She thinks it's because I love her. It's because I wouldn't get laid otherwise. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend confessed to me that she'd cheated on me with my best friend. I can't get mad at her, because I cheated on her with him before she did. FML
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML
Today, my wife came home from work early and told me she'd been fired. She was really upset so I told her how much she means to me and how much I love her to help cheer her up. She then told me she was caught getting it on with another employee. FML
Today, at a bar, a drunk girl kissed me, so I went home and confessed what happened to my girlfriend. She forgave me but took it as permission to admit she’s cheated sexually at least once a month for over a year, then got mad I didn’t immediately forgive her like she forgave me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML
Today, my best friend resolved things with her boyfriend after he had admitted to cheating on her. I felt really guilty, because I drunkenly hooked up with her boyfriend last month. She said, "I felt better when he told me that the girl was extremely ugly and bad in bed." FML
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she cheated on me with my best friend. The best part is that I couldn't tell her a thing, because I actually cheated on her with the same friend before. FML
Today, I came home from a weekend trip with some friends, and walked straight in on my girlfriend cheating on me. She burst into tears and began apologizing. Her exact words were "I'm so sorry! I thought you were coming back tomorrow." FML
Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say it when I caught him sleeping with my best friend. FML
Today, I caught my 20 year old daughter having sex with my best friend's husband. Apparently it's my fault for coming home early. FML
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Top comments
sireen 0
you're pathetic.
EvilHippyEmperor 0
Why can I hear The Offspring's "Self Esteem" playing in my head?
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Comments (159)
xxmollyxx 25
That's very very sad.
Exhumed91 0
Why hasn't anyone pointed out that no, no she does not think that the reason is he loves her, and she knows damn well he's desperate?
YouGotPwnt 0
You sir, are a Playa.
englishmuffin 0
If you don't love her, but are staying with her purely for the sex, you are not much better than she is. I'm not even sure who is using who here, because she could very well still be with you just so you can pay for things.
lovell_says_hey 0
That was probably her excuse. You two deserve each other.
tomsabin 0
Wow, what a loving relationship you have.
fxdxhk90 0
Dump her, go out and get some strange. Staying with someone for this reason is pretty pathetic.
woah_dang_baby_fml 0
Wow, you guys must love each other a lot ...
_paper_moon_ 0
Your life must be pretty pathetic if you stay in a poisonous relationship JUST so you can have sex... You can't afford hookers?
k10tree 0
How is this an fml?