Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the neck while she was cooking on the stove. Apparently I scared her and now I have a nice burn mark on my head from the hot frying pan she hit me with. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend threw boiling water at me to get me off my phone. It worked, but now I'm burned. FML
Today, my girlfriend hit me on the head with a frying pan for a funny video, because she thought it would go bonk and make me do a funny reaction. She must be a new kind of stupid cause I got four stitches, a hairline fracture, and a headache. FML
Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
Today, while cooking, I managed to burn my finger. I quickly turned the tap on and ran my finger under cold water, but apparently someone had just used the hot tap, because boiling water flooded out onto my nicely scalded finger. FML
Today, I was cleaning a pan. I turned the water on, and it was super hot. My reaction was to slam my hand down. On a knife. So, not only do I have a burned hand, but there's also a huge cut on it from the knife. FML
Today, I went over to this girl's house that I really like. I was planning on cooking her dinner. In the process, the grease in the pan got too hot and caught fire. We ended up having to call the fire department. FML
Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML
Today, I'm meeting my boyfriend's very conservative parents for the first time, so I decided to dress appropriately and curl my hair to match. In doing so, I accidentally touched my neck with the iron, and I now have a burn there that look a lot like a hickey. FML
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Top comments
therevolution 0
sounds like a hot mess
princesslayha 0
yea and if you ever say that to a girl you won't get any sex cooking or cleaning ^
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Comments (81)
therevolution 0
sounds like a hot mess
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
Looks like the OP *puts on glasses* Couldnt handle the heat and therefore should get out of the kitchen YEAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
triple_double 1
This is hard to believe that someones first reaction would be to take the frying pan, square up to you, look at you, have a cup of tea together, and then aim it right at your neck. yay.
triple_double 1
did i say neck? head... whatever it's late and apparently there's anti flood protection for comments
jewban 3
5 nice one lol
Shivermeshamrock 0
@5 I guess you could say... *puts on sunglasses* Random CSI reference. YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
fakeaccountX 6
OOOOOOOOOH BURN
z620 0
that's hot...
sexyschmergel 0
wtf
Alpha35 4
o yes OP u got laid by a pan
breenarae25 0
lo
sirbrainiac 2
l
zinoxity 23
2 = Attention *****.
_HeadShot_ 0
2 = nice ****
oh_wow_why_me 0
you have a beautiful... face
PiiMPiiN_DA_H03Z 0
2= just like everyone else
Currentlyonfire 4
serves you right for trying to get into some kitchen sex. keep your sausage in your pants before she cooks it fool.
pengiesully 0
atleast she's in the kitchen
jcortez1594 0
Right where she belongs
ZERO530 5
I Told that Bitch To Make Me A Sandwich
77taylah33 0
41 eff off
Elmo_1526 6
dumbshit -___-
doctordoom 0
haha she was in the kitchen doin her job shoulda left her alone
77taylah33 0
hey girls jobs are not just in the kitchen yer we cook but that is not what we are here for,,
christianSRA 0
liar it's all your needed for sex cooking and cleaning ;)
princesslayha 0
yea and if you ever say that to a girl you won't get any sex cooking or cleaning ^
ujonesy 0
no..it's definitely where you women folk belong.
77taylah33 0
38 and 51 if you keep saying that then you will be alone with a messy house, empty belly and a virgin
borkchop1992 15
38 51 yes 64 no
lexxyolivia 0
damn. i was just about to make that joke(:
EXTREMOAMADEUS 0
sexist bastards like u die alone
Jojo08_fml 0
you guys are douches
EXTREMOAMADEUS 0
doctor doom shall die alone due to his igborant comment
54754N4 14
as if 1 comment will decide his fate. He might be a sexist right now but the way you judgemental folks feel that u know exactly how he'll turn up later on is way lamer. leave him be, he chose to think that way.
gozar_fml 1
I'm going to automatically mark ydi on any fml that uses the word "apparently".
wisftovpfr 0
haha, I will as well. good plan. "Today I bla bla bla, apparently I bla bla. FML"
wisftovpfr 0
this is fake. whose initial reaction is to lift a hot pan and turn exactly the right amount to hit someone's head
tmd4L 7
i'm guessing it's not hard to hit someone with a frying pan.
ladybuuggy 0
...riiiight..likely story. stop walking on your toes and actually make a sound and that wouldn't happen
cantthinkofuser 0
Thats what happens when you disturb a woman in the kitchen :P
SuperGrinder86 0
Give her a Cleveland steamer as payback!
Lizza330 28
What is that?
Lizza330 28
I'd say that you kind of deserved it, because you startled her, but then again why would her reaction be to hit you with a hot pan? She should've looked to see who it was before doing anything.
CatEyes66 0
I thought the same thing, maybe she has been in a bad situation like that before and knew how to handle it.