Today, my bitchy co-worker decided that being given a compliment on her shoes is sexual harassment, and worthy of reporting me to our boss over. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after telling my boss that trailing a hand up someone's leg and leering at them constantly is counted as sexual harassment, I got called an "unappreciative little whiny bitch." FML
Today, a female coworker kissed me so I reported it to my boss, but he told me I should take the compliment, and asked me why the hell I was complaining about "getting some." I’m a guy, but I’m sure if I was a woman and I’d had a kiss forced on me, it would be a huge issue. FML
Today, I asked one of the girls at work out on a date. She responded by filing a harassment complaint. Now, I can't speak to her at all without being written up. FML
Today, I had to give a sexual harassment seminar to my department. Someone put in a complaint that my example made them feel uncomfortable. FML
Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML
Today, my boss bitched me out on the sales floor for a good 10 minutes, because I wasn't "smiling the right way" for our customers. FML
Today, I told one of my coworkers that she looked really cute today. Later she sent an email to me and cc'd the entire office saying, "It really makes me feel uncomfortable when you say things like that to me. And I shouldn't have to feel that way at work." FML
Today, the coworker I like reported me to HR for "sexual harassment." All I did was make him lunch every day, give him 'just because' gifts, and compliment him in a non-sexual way. It sure isn't "sexual harassment" when another coworker of ours does the exact same things; in fact, he praises it and acts indifferent to me. FML
Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML
Today, a coworker grabbed my ass for the third time. I went to my boss to complain about the sexual harassment. He told me to suck it up and enjoy the attention, and that it was my fault for having a huge, round ass. I think it's time for a new job. FML
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Top comments
niftyismybitch 21
Were you ogling her toe cleavage?
micha090 21
What a bitch she is. But if your boss is going to buy her story, i can confidently say that he is an idiot OP.
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Comments (104)
micha090 21
What a bitch she is. But if your boss is going to buy her story, i can confidently say that he is an idiot OP.
Robbieisadowg 16
I can't believe that OP's boss would believe her story. Its not like OP said "Your boobs are huge, can I touch them?" OP simply complimented her on her fashion choice.
drewflav 17
As per FML history, the boss is always stupid and will rule against OP no matter the situation.
Bcfrmkc816 17
Yes and you are going to be in a lot of hot water all the time. If he does buy it I would start looking for another job after you have done everything to convince him other wise. And if she keeps doing it and he don't you have a good reason to file harassment against her.
niftyismybitch 21
She must think you have a foot fetish...
mFUNdo21 17
"nice shoes, if they're the only thing you're gonna wear tonight" *winks and licks lips in a creepy fashion*
aardvarkish 17
Haha!! God call.
AquanTheDragon 5
Aardvark, why the **** should I call God? I think He's busy anyway.
niftyismybitch 21
Were you ogling her toe cleavage?
OnlyAvailableID 28
When a girl has webbing inbetween her toes, it just gets me off.
PieGuu 14
You are right, #1. You are right.
Jocgre 13
Crazy bitch...
CocaColaPepsi 13
well he said compliment. maybe a compliment to him goes something like, "those shoes look great on you, but they'd look better on my bedroom floor(;" or maybe " the shoes are nice, but they're too close together. oh I know, why don't you lie down and spread those shoes apart(;"
fmlreader123 5
Some people are absolutely rediculous, I suggest talking to your boss about it. Hopefully he will take your side, if not then he is an idiot.
pdp_fml 21
This person is a walking time bomb waiting to go off. Refrain from talking to her in the future unless it is entirely business related.
Bcfrmkc816 17
And another coworker is present who won't take her side.
jw90 18
Does anyone still wear those anymore?
jw90 18
What a bitch. Anything these days can be considered "sexual harassment". It's ridiculous.
blankjack 6
Only in the USA actually..
Brandon_NW 9
Slap that bitch in the face, with a chair!
Rainhawk94 27
That'll show her!!!