Today, I broke up with my now ex-girlfriend for the 5th time. She still hasn't got the hint. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Sweet relief
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML
Sorry
Today, I had to break up with my girlfriend twice. Apparently, the first time she thought I was kidding. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML
Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML
Her revenge
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML
Today, I got a text message saying, "I'm sorry, I know it's our 4 month anniversary but it's not working out, I need to break up with you" followed by her complaining that I never call her as well. WTF? I haven't had a girlfriend for 6 months. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
Today, my girlfriend sent her new boyfriend over to my place to break up with me for her. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML
Today, I walked 6 miles to see my girlfriend. After 5 and a half miles, she broke up with me because I never visit her. FML
Top comments
DocBastard 40
Does Hallmark make a "I dumped you, bitch! Move on!" card?
NuyoRicanGirl 3
then don't talk to her anymore :-/
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Comments (130)
darkmis1 18
Push her out of a moving car-that should give her the idea.
shuzuko 2
I guess the people who don't understand this FML haven't had to deal with those people. It took my ex a month and a half to realize I was actually, really, truly, very serious about breaking up with him. I had to tell him "I'm breaking up with you now, please leave me alone" five or six times before he stopped showing up at my house randomly.
RedPillSucks 33
Klingons don't take no for an answer. You need to hit her with your pain stick.
Danieleb56 0
maybe you should quit going back out with her then..
Connor_Williams 2
or your stupid ass hasn't got the hint
Egnar 19
Look; your obligation as "boyfriend" is over as you've already broken up with her. It may sound stupid and silly but this is the time in which you stop answering her calls and her texts. Stop reading her e-mails and stop saying hi to her on whatever instant messaging services you use. When she shows up at your house you don't answer the door, you talk to her through the door. . .The only real response should be " We've been through this already, I broke up with you , please leave me alone. People like her won't take the hint easily and you have to tread carefully because if she gets any sign of hope that you still like her [never say anything about the good times or how you miss her at all] her resolve will just strengthen. . . .It's not the dick thing to do, you already held up your end up the bargain, now you need to get her to end her part.
slantyshanty 7
have more sex with her, but start seeing someone else.
G6chick 0
...how
dirtylemonz 0
so stop getting back together with her ydi
thebassopotomous 0
Take her to the park, ram her rectum for a few minutes in the bushes and leave her there for the hobos