Today, my girlfriend chose the most expensive restaurant in town, then spent the entire time facebooking, texting, and playing games on her phone while I dined in silence. This is the second time we've been out this week. She didn't even eat her food. I didn't even get a thank you. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. To celebrate, I spent the day with her and then took her out to a really nice dinner. She is currently giving me the silent treatment because I didn't write "Happy Birthday" on her Facebook wall. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML
What do you want from me?
Today, after weeks of my girlfriend moaning that I never go anywhere, I went out with some friends. An hour in, she started blowing up my phone. When I answered it, she was screaming in rage because I wasn't home to cook dinner. FML
Today, I wanted to take my girlfriend to a nice dinner before prom. Her parents followed her in, and joined us to "keep an eye on me." They interrupted all our conversations, ate an expensive meal, then got up and walked out when the waitress brought the $95 check, leaving me to pay for it. FML
Today, my date unexpectedly brought her friend to dinner with us. They seemed bored of me after ten minutes and left me out of their conversation for the rest of the night. Oh, and they made me pay for both of them. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML
Influencer in the wild
Today, I went on a date with this girl who turned up with bags of Instagram camera equipment. She photographed everything, the drinks, food, and yet we barely said a word to each other. In the end, I paid my half and left. She didn’t notice I’d gone for at least 15 minutes before texting me. FML
Tonight on First Dates
Today, I went on a date that went well, until the bill came and she quickly shoved it in my direction, then went to the loo. Rude, but I thought nothing of it… until our waiter took pity and told me I’m the fourth guy she’s had this week who'd been made to pay for her. I paid half, then went home. FML
The reviews are in
Today, I went to a movie and a dinner with a girl. During dinner, she excused herself to go to the bathroom, so I checked my social media feeds while waiting for her to return. She'd posted on her Twitter "Worst. Ever." I thought it was going well. FML
Today, I was on a dinner date with a guy I really like. I guess I was on my phone too much because halfway through the date he sent me a text saying how much my half of the bill would be. FML
Top comments
dee3108 0
straight out dude... you seem like a very nice guy.. who just so happened to be stuck with a hardcore bitch.. dump her and find one that appreciates!
Learning2livelyf 4
Sounds like she's not interested in you. Time to move on.
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Comments (466)
dee3108 0
straight out dude... you seem like a very nice guy.. who just so happened to be stuck with a hardcore bitch.. dump her and find one that appreciates!
DropDead77 11
that really sucks, I had to put up with the same thing a few times
CAPTmok 7
For misfortunes like this, I'd normally blame the 'blackberry effect' (I think op's gf uses this ). But ignoring someone totally is just plain wrong.....
robc32ca 4
#1 is right you can do better
locachick101 0
well if is soo into her phone then you shoulda text and be like 'hey where you at' or 'can you pay attention over here!?'
Carpy 8
Hit it & Quit it. Sounds like you've already spent too much time & money on the bitch. You'll find better.
MrsLender_fml 3
Go home, screw her a little, and then tell her to screw off and leave. She's definitely a bitch and you shouldn't put up with her at all.
NotYourOrdinary7 6
Toot it and boot it!
RyanMacVey 17
ahaha :L
WallyTheWombat 0
70 is only half right. It's original prankster.
kyanisaurus 0
ditch the bitch :)
CrazyGirl445 4
I agree. I wish my boyfriend would do something that nice for me. yea instead fr started acting like a dick the day before my birthday and asked for a bj
CheckMyProfile 17
invite her to a very expensive restaurant, and leave her with bill ! :D
Osito2011 9
sounds like y'all are not dating anymore, and you are in the friend zone. sorry bro dude the ungrateful bitch
sterlingarcher 1
just leave her and find someone who appreciates what you do, you seem like a really nice guy :)
InboundOyster 0
<----- pic very much related
uncbballwins 0
Hump and dump
biass 0
140- I'm stealing your pic and making it my main screen on my iPod. It's hilarious. Dude, tell her she needs to be better or your leaving her. She's probably cheating or something. Unless your desperate. Then hold her until your dying breath. Or until you find someone else.
rallets 23
**** it and chuck it
MissBunny25 0
OP, there is only one solution... first, you buy a huge pot full of boiling water. then, toss that bitch in and watch her scream. also, take a giant piss on her as she boils. that bitch does not deserve life -.-
blaherman 12
next time she does it get up and boot the phone out of her hand's.
MizzErikaHart 8
sex, then next... I seen there were sum broken little combo rhyme things. that's all I could think of.
katelynslikewoah 0
agreed
poetoflove 2
hell yea haha I've done that before
mike3775 39
Time to move on.
commodore350 0
#159 you have some twisted ideas, good though
Finn_the_human 5
What?! You gotta be flipping kidding! Don't worry I know a few things about princesses that I could teach you.
elementex 0
good suggestion. you might wanna rope him up w yr sister or cousin if any.
BellyDancinCheer 0
i agree with #1 completly, ur nice enuff to take her somewhere expensive and she doesnt give a damn!! cold hearted bitch
esu 5
you should have texted her during dinner maybe shes shy....
Barney_Rubble_75 0
subtle. classy.
mintcar 10
Hahaha 213, for some reason that comment made me chuckle.
KUSHaholic 0
hahaha toot it and boot it!! Ayye
knightsfb 0
159 what is it with you and piss? most of the time you comment u mention it. just saying
allyrox123 0
agree with #1.... she doesnt deserve you OP
allyrox123 0
agree with #1.... she doesnt deserve you OP
allyrox123 0
agree with #1.... she doesnt deserve you OP
staceysgenesis16 0
eww wata *****.. i would have appreciated that .. gurls like that make me want to shove their fones down their throats and watch them choke to death.. but thays juat me :)
born_hustla 26
very harsh bunny lol
xdannyx117x 0
um agreed with bunny **** that bit$h
CatTTy 10
Truth. Run for the hills.
not_cool808 16
lol princess bubble gum!
Learning2livelyf 4
Sounds like she's not interested in you. Time to move on.
movingtarget_fml 4
yeah move on to her mom or if she has any sisters
biass 0
Or her bestfriend. Or someone she hates.
tulsafml 0
or her grandma
humzizzl3 0
get rid of the ***** & find someone worthwhile
dirtyblond 4
or her dog
NuniaB 1
Looks like she WANTS him to dump her; she doesn't for whatever reason wants to break it up herself....
rallets 23
or her pet hamster
MizzErikaHart 8
or her dad
RavenRiley007 4
138-yeah that what it seems like...so OP it's up to you mate
McGherkin 0
Or the dolphin she adopted for £2 a month last year.
nitaaxboo 0
sounds to me you need a new girlfriend ... she's not in to you if she spends the whole tine on her phone that's just rude!
PrinceFroggy 0
OP should have texted/Facebook messages her.
Scrubscrazy 0
Yea dump her ass!
ImaWiseGuy 5
here's what you gotta do.....1st) punch the kitty one last time.....2nd) let her know her acting contract is up and you have no interest in renegotiating.....3rd) recruit a new franchise player.......
Shootamonkey3 0
^^^ The man of great advice, follow it!
moodi_fml 0
OP invite her for a restaurant again and then tell the waitress to tell her you're coming.
covette 0
dump her...or on her
IMveryHUNGRY 3
124 is a wise man
hellogoodbye1996 6
wow. time to leave man. there are other girls who would be completely apprechiative rather than a spoiled brat.
ElGranOrgo 0
Dump that BITCH!
bbstar22 0
exactly
ToxicTyrael 26
But via Facebook or text! Otherwise she might not listen...
WOODYfromthaBAY 0
damn, i hate when chicks are so into their phones. try talking to em and its like ur not even there. its ridiculous
sterlingarcher 1
I'm like that.. I couldn't live without my phone.. haha just kidding! that is like super rude I see girls like that all the time! but yeah..
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
Get rid of her before you get too attached and can't let her go D:
XcaleX 0
I couldn't agree more, get rid of her ass before it's too late.
N3v43h 0
She's likely sadistic, and absolutely gets off on using u, while she txts the many other guys, she's using and snoozing with. Get checked, cash out ur chips, eat the loss, and u'll immediately be in a gain, dispute ur "loss" instead if losing ur time, money, dignity, and any sense of self or happiness u still have and could have in the future. Definitely get it, before u split it, then immediately break it and say it's not u, it's me... I'm sorry. Ur just not what I'm looking for...
N3v43h 0
Or she might just want u to do it, so u don't try to win her back. But most likely she has no concept of love, so the best she can do is "win the game"... don't toss ur pearls to swine, brother. Get out quick. She's likely a good talker, and likes carnage, so save urself now, or ur chances of unf***ing ur life, will become more and more impossible, after ur depressed, and drained of everything, unable to move on.
chucachyna 0
lol just take her to a cheap restaurant...she's not going to realize the difference unless you text her and let her know.
hollylollyxoxo 0
haha true dat!
ohyess909 0
good one
NuyoRicanGirl 3
don't take the bitch out
bgo7 0
who does that?! haha jerkk
ohSNAPyall 27
douchebags