Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He told me he'd have to ask his dad if it was OK. I thought he was just kidding, until he pulled out his phone and called his dad. After a few minutes of "Come on, Dad" and "But why?" he hung up and said his dad wouldn't let him. He's 22. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He's smart, attractive, and has a steady job. Imagine my surprise when he accepted. Then imagine my surprise when he followed up with, "Hah, just kidding. You're fucking BORING!" FML
Today, I found out that my father asked my best friend to marry him. He's 38 and we're 18. She said yes. FML
Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend's dad for permission to take her hand in marriage. He said no, because he doesn't want her marrying a "sexist idiot who treats her like property", which he thinks asking permission amounts to, then told me to grow up. FML
Today, I called my dad to tell him my boyfriend had proposed to me, and that we're planning on being married this summer. He was surprised at the short engagement, so I said, "Well, we're almost 30." Dad replied, "Wow, I left your mom when I was 35!" So not the conversation for that information, Dad. FML
Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend's father if I could marry his daughter. He smiled, shook my hand, and said "No. Now get out of my house." FML
Today, I was babysitting a five year-old boy. Somehow the topic of relationships came up, and he asked me if I had a boyfriend. When I told him that I was single, he got all excited and asked if he could be my boyfriend. It would have been cute… except he was the first guy to ever ask me out. I'm 18. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him. When I happily told my dad, he kept asking if I'd consider taking back my ex. FML
Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask out my crush, only to find out that they're already in a committed relationship with my mom. FML
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Top comments
ShinedownLuv 14
Yeah, I think he was B.Sing you
ladylilly25 20
Doesn't sound like a man to me.
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Comments (138)
Fmlsea 28
I think its about time that he got removed from his parents hips.
xMew 7
Well he wanted you so the man of your dreams likes you
Sheh_fml 25
You might have dodged a bullet there...
mmcrae97 9
Soooo if he ever gets married, is he going to ask his dad if he's allowed to have kids too?
mekoveya 10
I'm confused as to how you can still refer to him as "the man of your dreams" after that b.s. Clearly he's a little boy in a man's body.
hope4life 9
Your better off without him. Trust me, after dating a boy who was 25 and has a similar issue with his father, it's so not worth it!
EtherealNight85 9
This is not the man you were looking for. You may go about your search for him. Move along.
doctorhook86 25
You dream about very strange men, OP.
chosha_fml 27
You should ask his dad out. Especially if he faked the call. :)
lynjeb 7
Yeah that is a lie for no.