Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Today, my girlfriend and I did a 69 for the first time and I was on the bottom. When she orgasmed, not only did she fart, a bit of poo came out with the fart, and actually went up my nose. I’ve gone through a whole box of tissues blowing my nose, but I can still smell it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
Today, I shat myself in front of my girlfriend's family, after drinking too much the previous night and waking up with major stomach problems. FML
Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML
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Top comments
UGADAWG34 0
she's a **** if she leaves you for that...
SillyAsh 0
I'm sure if she really wanted to be your girl, she wouldn't dump you for farting. I fart after sex and in the mornings with my boyf. It's not a big deal.
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Comments (116)
thescrutonator 0
if she isn't okay with that, then you have bigger issues than whether or not you farted. i would be surprised if my boyfriend DIDN'T fart at any given moment!
eastbaydad 0
At least u came before she went!!! Playa!!! Dutch oven time beatch!!!
cheese1756 0
How could she not love you because you farted?
mister_moops 0
umm. for one thing, tummy? are you four? second, why the **** do you think she would break up with you because you farted?
Upside_Down 0
I think it gross and funny, but I am used to it growing up with 5 boys. if my boyfriend did that I'd probably slap him and laugh. :]
rryyaann656 0
if she leaves you for that she's the biggest bitch
Illumi113 0
Nobody who's old enough to have a girlfriend or sex says "tummy ache", you lying douchebag.
pulpfiction_fml 3
I would break up with someone if they farted
phixx 0
EPIC FAIL!!!!! how the hell can you do that while doing it
Broeman 0
A tummy ache. Seriously. A tummy ache. Who the **** are you, Winnie the Pooh?
JoseIsAdork 31
maybe he had the rumblies in his tumblies?