Today, at work I was talking to a co-worker about what a slacker my manager was, and how all she did was stand around and talk. She was standing behind me the whole time. I now have sore nuts due to a direct hit from a broom handle. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my co-worker threw a rubber mallet at my face, and I broke my finger in the process of saving my face. She then told me to "take it up with HR, bitch". She's the HR manager. FML
Today, it was a really slow day at work. One thing lead to another, and soon enough we were all taking turns shoving each other across the office on a swivel chair. Our boss came in during my turn, and I got singled out for a verbal warning. Everyone else got off with a disapproving glare. FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, at work, I was walking to the back office, and I didn't know my manager was following me. After I walked through the door, without looking, I reached behind me to close it. Instead of grabbing the door handle, I got a handful of his crotch. FML
Today, a work colleague was trying to kill a fly that was buzzing around the place. I was about to go on my break, but was stopped because she missed the fly and accidentally whacked me in the balls in the process. By the time I didn’t feel sick anymore, my break was over. FML
Today, at my new job, a coworker offered to help me mop the floors since she wasn't busy. I ended up getting written up by my boss for supposedly being too lazy and making other people finish my work. FML
Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML
Today, at work at a store, I was sitting on the floor stocking a bottom shelf. A woman in a motorized cart did not see me, and ran over my hand. When I alerted her about what she had done she laughed. FML
Today, my lazy bastard of a co-worker punched me straight in the jaw because he didn't get the promotion I did. Being his new manager, I fired him. A few hours later, I was fired for "abusing" my power. FML
Today, I was at work, when I got bored and started spinning around in my chair for a little fun. As I was spinning, I went to grab my phone. I missed and sent my phone flying, hitting my coworker in the face. My boss witnessed the whole thing. FML
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Top comments
raider27 7
Can't she get into trouble for hitting a co-worker?
BIEBERSLAYER 10
Your manager sounds like a real ball buster to me
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Comments (153)
neonblue120 6
Another fine example of how misandry is not only tolerated but celebrated. Oh the story I don't believe, but it's the reaction. Do you thing a chick talking about how her male boss assaulted her would any sane person say she deserved it even on this website? Ok a couple of trolls but I mean real people.
Levvy 22
I wonder how people would react if this were a male manager slapping a female employee for talking about him. Probably much more poorly. Even though a slap to the face doesn't carry the chance of internal bleeding or destroying someone's ability to reproduce. Oh internet, you're a funny place. (Don't get me wrong; I'm not saying a male manager slapping a female employee is remotely acceptable)
0opsie 6
If it was a woman getting slapped by a man it wouldn't even be on this site because it wouldn't be "funny" but shocking. But because he's a man he "had it coming" no matter what he did and it makes for a nice chuckle. -_- Double standards annoy the hell out of me.
chessypie 0
Ouch
chessypie 0
Ouch
FoxOnTheStreet 9
I don't see the point of hitting a guy in the balls unless he's putting you in serious danger. Talking crap does not mean you deserve to have your junk damaged. Like others are saying, report her for assault.
juston_p 1
That's cause for a lawsuit.
JChow4040 0
heheh, if she was sweeping, she aint a slacker
kalbrek009 20
Sue for bodily harm, assault & battery, pain & suffering...then that ass hat will have to work to pay you for the injury! :)
MitchShadows 1
At least you'll get a nice settlement. You dud press charges, right!?!?
ugottaluvme 0
Woah! Calm down bro, why press charges I come in peace
Johnpinkerton 4
Least she didn't fire you