Today, at the Black Friday Sale, a fully grown man hit my 5 year old daughter for an Xbox. In anger, I punched the guy and gave him a bloody nose. I'm now banned from Best Buy, and my daughter has a concussion. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML
Today, my 6 year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
Today, it's Black Friday. I got sucker-punched by some woman over a ten dollar griddle. FML
Today, I went shopping with my two sons and my wife. We got separated after a while, and I spotted my son in the video game section of the store. I snuck up behind him and playfully slapped him on the back of the head. The kid turned around and it wasn't my son. His mom was none to happy. FML
Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom was over on the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said, "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML
Today, I paid my daughter a surprise visit, only to see her husband beating her. I charged in and slammed him into the wall. She screamed at me to stop. They'd recently gotten into martial arts and were sparring, and now he's got a broken arm. FML
Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML
Today, my daughter had to deal with a Karen at her job, lost her temper, and punched her unconscious just to shut her up. Sounds like a good thing, right? Wrong, she pressed charges, got my daughter arrested, and she’s now facing years in prison for grievous bodily harm. FML
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Top comments
uprising_fml 0
what a badass . at least you avenged your kid .
Irishxoxo 2
At least you tried to defend your daughter.
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Comments (392)
Sethro 1
I'd press charges...
cOONTAIL 5
I don't see why there are so many people blaming OP for bringing his kid to a store. When I was a little kid, it was only my mother and I. She had no money to hire a babysitter and there were no siblings or any other parents to take care of me. This situation is plenty more common than you might think. Then again, some parents just like to bring their kids to stores if they're well behaved or maybe the kid wanted to come or maybe the parent wanted to buy something for his kid. FYL, ignore the haters, and I hope you gave the guy a concussion.
Debuscus 0
I think you deserved it. You deserved it for not killing the guy.
Scarlettx7 0
You stood up for your daughter !
thatonedame 6
Why on earth would you bring a young child black Friday shopping?!? People get trampled and seriously injured over cheap tv's. F your poor child for having an idiot of a parent.
Hillyard 10
You should have broken more than just his nose and then pressed charges. Sue the asshole store.
SomethingMoto 0
If it was my kid I'd probably be getting charged with murder.
Bludmagnus 13
The most disgusting fact of this story is the man defending his child was thrown out of and banned from Best Buy... while the man who assaulted a five year old girl was just allowed to walk away... Sue the store, have the man arrested... and make certain the local television news covers it.
DirtyJerzey8083 7
I sincerely hope you got that MOFO real good cuz if that were my daughter My husband would have beaten the man with the x-box
blushy 14
go super mom!!!