Today, at the Black Friday Sale, a fully grown man hit my 5 year old daughter for an Xbox. In anger, I punched the guy and gave him a bloody nose. I'm now banned from Best Buy, and my daughter has a concussion. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML
Today, my 6 year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
Today, it's Black Friday. I got sucker-punched by some woman over a ten dollar griddle. FML
Today, I went shopping with my two sons and my wife. We got separated after a while, and I spotted my son in the video game section of the store. I snuck up behind him and playfully slapped him on the back of the head. The kid turned around and it wasn't my son. His mom was none to happy. FML
Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom was over on the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said, "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML
Today, I paid my daughter a surprise visit, only to see her husband beating her. I charged in and slammed him into the wall. She screamed at me to stop. They'd recently gotten into martial arts and were sparring, and now he's got a broken arm. FML
Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML
Today, my daughter had to deal with a Karen at her job, lost her temper, and punched her unconscious just to shut her up. Sounds like a good thing, right? Wrong, she pressed charges, got my daughter arrested, and she’s now facing years in prison for grievous bodily harm. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
uprising_fml 0
what a badass . at least you avenged your kid .
Irishxoxo 2
At least you tried to defend your daughter.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (392)
etnies123 5
You did the right thing
tomkenney22 0
I'd hit that dumb hick for ya if I was there
basem_fml 1
I don't usually condone violence, but I think I would have done the same in your situation. Screw bestbuy.
shaz_09 6
Some ppl have no sense. No Xbox is worth hitting a little kid over. Your a good parent for standing up for her.
frazmataz 0
Well done! That dick is a .. Erm dick!
K2Phresh 1
Way to avenge your kid OP im proud
This_war_is_ours 0
thats ******* awful. what a pig i hope his dick falls off and he burns in hell
canadian93 2
Hurray for greed and capitalism.
DecemberSkye44 0
why the **** are so many people on him about bringing his kid?????? ya its crazy. its busy. it does not give justification to ANYONE ****** HITTING A CHILD. you shouldn't have to expect that when going to your local electronics store not matter what ****** day it is. you people that would expect your child to get hit in a store deserve punched yourselves for just accepting that as 'how it is' **** off. people need to grow the hell up or just take their desperate asses and jump off a cliff.
TheBeanieChic 1
I give you props for sticking up to your daughter LIKE A BOSS!