Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 17-year-old son attempted to rob the bank I work at while I was off shift. FML
Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML
Today, I took my 4 year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed, "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex." FML
Today, I went to my local bank after getting an email from them concerning unknown purchases. Four hours later, I was still in police custody. Someone had been using my account to purchase guns and drugs. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML
Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come true. Unfortunately, it was because he'd been arrested for trying to rob a bank. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, I went to withdraw 200 dollars. At the ATM, I noticed a suspicious man standing really close to me. I was nervous about entering my pin number, and worried he was looking at my account information. In my panic, I got all the way home before realizing that I'd left the cash in the machine. FML
Today, my son is so pathetic that when a tiny, unarmed 5-foot tall female thief robbed our store, he didn’t grab the baseball bat, he didn’t slam the anti-theft door on the counter closed, he didn’t even press the big alarm button, he just started crying, put his hands up, and let her empty the till. FML
Today, at the bank, I went to get some coffee from their machine. I gave it my money and pressed the buttons but nothing was happening. After banging on the machine for ten minutes and calling a teller over, a little boy reached up on his tippy toes to press the giant green START button for me. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
I can see a very good life coming from this kid. Maybe not a legal one, but a rich one none the less.
Mariebaz 11
Why did you allow your son to bring a gun- even a fake- into a bank in the first place?
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Comments (147)
greenie213 23
Good thing you didn't take him to an airport.
stej1985 3
lmao. may be a little controversial but fyl op. I agree with you... their job is to assess the situation. is it likely an 8year old is going to rob a bank? doubtfull. and if she had worries she should have got the manager....
MrArmy 1
A 8 year old is able to pull the trigger like any other adult. Look at the 10 year old who stole his moms car. The 10 year old Sao he did it because he likes to do bad things
TheDrifter 24
8 year olds shoot people "by accident" not understanding that dead is permanent and 10 year olds sell crack and knowingly commit murders fairly regularly. I suggest hiding in a bubble somewhere, the modern world is scary.
kristat 14
32- they're job is actually not to assess the situation... that's the job of the police. If it was an actual robbery and the teller took the time to assess the situation and go get the manager the robber could have already killed someone or be long gone. Most bank robberies last only a minute or so. Most banks' policies on robberies don't leave room for judgement calls... you have to treat any threat as serious to protect everyone involved.
ebethsuperstar 2
You totally deserved it, if only for calling the teller dim-witted. This person was doing their job clearly. Just because he is 8 doesn't mean they shouldn't take a threat seriously. Seems to me like a solid plan to have your kid as an accomplice for a robbery in case a "dim-witted" teller assumes a real gun is a toy and doesn't do anything to stop you. Don't give your kids guns to play with and maybe they won't act out violent scenarios.
jgriff79 23
How was she suppose to talk to her manager? He told her to FREEZE!
ManInTheMachine 20
The teller is a dim-wit because he actually thought an 8 year old was attempting to rob a bank. Honestly, how likely is it that a parent is going to put a gun in their child's hand and say "Okay honey, if you can rob this bank for me, I'll get you your favorite videogame!" Good Lord, the amount of uptight people on here is baffling. The fact that the mom wasn't arrested should tell you that the teller took this WAY too seriously.
jgriff79 23
Sorry I thought I was commenting on the post above this.
McNerdyNerd 8
Just as a side note, because I am pretty in the middle of this controversy, parents use their kids to shoplift and all sorts of stuff anymore. I can see someone doing this for real..even as a reverse 'hostage' situation..
AmethystRain 20
46 - the intention may not have been to actually rob the bank, but it could have been a real gun that the child took from mom and dad's gun cabinet without them knowing. A person being held up has only seconds to react, and usually isn't going to stop and ponder whether or not it's a toy.
ManInTheMachine 20
57-It could happen, but it's highly unlikely that it would even happen, let alone be successful. To add on to my original comment, I'm not saying that the child should be swinging around a gun wherever. I'm just saying that the teller overreacted.
Levvy 22
So, ManInTheMachine, what feature is it on a gun that makes it physically impossible for a child to point it at someone and pull its trigger? The next step is for you to answer, "None," so we can skip that. So, has no child ever murdered or robbed an adult, with or without an adult accomplice? The answer to that is "No," as well, so no need to wait for you to provide that. So, has no child ever been coerced by an adult to assist then in performing violence? If you've ever heard the phrase "child soldier" before, we both know the answer. But you're saying that the people in all these situations should have assumed the child in question was incapable of taking violent or criminal action.
TheJester12 15
I especially look for 8 year olds as possible terrorists and bank robbers. They are suspected to be innocent , and can be bribed into doing just about anything for a candy bar and a ride on a tire swing .
loverainyday 0
I suck
dutemplar 2
Congratulations... You are nominated for bad parent of the year.
missy2420 4
I think this comment was already posted but why did you let him carry around a fake gun? Or how could you not know he had the gun with him?!
falloutking12349 0
Hahahahahahaha freeze mofo
TheyCallMeDamien 18
I would've whooped his narrow behind.
greeneye_fml 12
Next time don't let your stupid kid bring his toy gun to a bank.