Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 17-year-old son attempted to rob the bank I work at while I was off shift. FML
Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML
Today, I took my 4 year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed, "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex." FML
Today, I went to my local bank after getting an email from them concerning unknown purchases. Four hours later, I was still in police custody. Someone had been using my account to purchase guns and drugs. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML
Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come true. Unfortunately, it was because he'd been arrested for trying to rob a bank. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, I went to withdraw 200 dollars. At the ATM, I noticed a suspicious man standing really close to me. I was nervous about entering my pin number, and worried he was looking at my account information. In my panic, I got all the way home before realizing that I'd left the cash in the machine. FML
Today, my son is so pathetic that when a tiny, unarmed 5-foot tall female thief robbed our store, he didn’t grab the baseball bat, he didn’t slam the anti-theft door on the counter closed, he didn’t even press the big alarm button, he just started crying, put his hands up, and let her empty the till. FML
Today, at the bank, I went to get some coffee from their machine. I gave it my money and pressed the buttons but nothing was happening. After banging on the machine for ten minutes and calling a teller over, a little boy reached up on his tippy toes to press the giant green START button for me. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
I can see a very good life coming from this kid. Maybe not a legal one, but a rich one none the less.
Mariebaz 11
Why did you allow your son to bring a gun- even a fake- into a bank in the first place?
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Comments (147)
Cali_Italian 8
I hate how people are calling the teller stupid. Yeah, an eight year old would be incredibly unlikely to rob a bank, but parents have made their kids do some pretty crazy shit. And while that might not be so common, if I'm a bank teller and if someone (no matter who) pulls out something that looks like a gun, then I am going to hit the silent alarm.
MrMeaner88 3
Not to mention banks take their policies very seriously. I've heard of bank tellers get fired after kicking a robbers ass! So the teller probably didnt want to get fired because "If this had been a real robbery, you would have screwd us all"
fogrunner 13
Congrats in advance for when your kid gets shot because someone thinks his gun is real.
bigmacswag101 2
Today I was almost arrested for a DUI because a cop thought I was high do to my Irish accent this isn't the first time it's happend FML
Namenlos_fml 20
It sounds more like the kid was dimwitted. think about if he had been full-grown. He could have been shot. Then you'd have no son. Silver lining.
hollyroberts 10
I live in the Waikato and I work in a bank. Which one was it?? And yeah, mistakes happen. You can't control what kids do.
anonymousgurl5 2
Why would you let the kid bring the gun into the bank?!
DeVaughnS 5
It was because he was black lol
dolceandkabana 1
What is your 8 year old doing with a realistic toy gun OP? He should be at home playing COD instead like all normal boys
jampang6 5
I see this about 50/50 on the iayls/ydi scale
nicrulezdood 5
seriously. Watch your ******* kids. They aren't cute or funny. Op had to know that the kid had the gun at some point, pay attention and shit like this won't happens. I applaud the teller for pressing the silent alarm, DI