Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 17-year-old son attempted to rob the bank I work at while I was off shift. FML
Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML
Today, I took my 4 year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed, "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex." FML
Today, I went to my local bank after getting an email from them concerning unknown purchases. Four hours later, I was still in police custody. Someone had been using my account to purchase guns and drugs. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML
Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come true. Unfortunately, it was because he'd been arrested for trying to rob a bank. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, I went to withdraw 200 dollars. At the ATM, I noticed a suspicious man standing really close to me. I was nervous about entering my pin number, and worried he was looking at my account information. In my panic, I got all the way home before realizing that I'd left the cash in the machine. FML
Today, my son is so pathetic that when a tiny, unarmed 5-foot tall female thief robbed our store, he didn’t grab the baseball bat, he didn’t slam the anti-theft door on the counter closed, he didn’t even press the big alarm button, he just started crying, put his hands up, and let her empty the till. FML
Today, at the bank, I went to get some coffee from their machine. I gave it my money and pressed the buttons but nothing was happening. After banging on the machine for ten minutes and calling a teller over, a little boy reached up on his tippy toes to press the giant green START button for me. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
I can see a very good life coming from this kid. Maybe not a legal one, but a rich one none the less.
Mariebaz 11
Why did you allow your son to bring a gun- even a fake- into a bank in the first place?
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Comments (147)
snowdust 2
I'm surprised a parent would let their child leave the house with a realistic-looking toy gun. Get rid of them all, OP, and he'll never be able to do it again!
purplebumblebee 2
Well she's not gonna think hey what if my son attempts a robbery? Who would?
westzac 7
What makes you think she knew? If a man can sneak a shotgun into a mall and walk around with it for an hour without being spotted, a kid with a plastic toy pistol can get passed his mom just by putting it in his waistband
ShamanBond 1
YDI for giving your son a realistic looking gun, bad parent, no donut.
bjf10 22
Realistic or not, the bank tellers are trained to cooperate and press the silent alarm.
THE_A_TEEN 28
For god's sake, It's a TOY. It does no harm. You're probably one of those extremist modern parent who wouldn't let their kid play tag because they're "it".
rhaemese 9
Of there is no donut, what about a cookie?
TheDrifter 24
35, if its a toy without the usual orange markings, how was the teller to know that the kid hadn't gotten his hands on a real gun? Untrained children with guns and little understanding of consequences are even more dangerous than your average armed robbery suspect.
lovebeecharmer 6
No way you deserve this!! It's just one of those darn things kids do, hope it wasn't too bad...but at leasts it makes a great story to tell later!
westzac 7
Agreed. Kids dont think of the things they do. The mom didnt know the kid brought it with him.
Icyghost17 10
Um, that's the bank teller job, to take any potential threat seriously. Why the hell would you let your son bring a toy gun into a bank?
westzac 7
It was an 8 year old. That's not a potential threat.
vhivfe 3
Families like these are the reason I do not want kids
hockeyoceancity 13
Wow great reason. You're probally a kid yourself still.
aml1991 9
That's not a reason to want children. I have two wonderful children. You just have to know how to raise them.. Not saying that OP didn't raise her son right.
jailbird616 5
Dont let fml stop you from having kids just raise them better
BubbleGrunge 18
This made me laugh way too hard. Gotta love kids, you never know what comes out of their mouths. Also, don't blame the bank teller she was just doing her job OP. You never know anymore about people.
Bonzer 2
*too
wuzuppipol_fml 2
Kids say something they dont know the consenquences.
TriflingAllDay 6
Or maybe he does know the consequences. And is testing the security system. I give him the benifit of the doubt.
perdix 31
Get him a real gun and a couple of masks. You won't have to ever hold down an honest job again, and all you have to do we drive the getaway car.
Enslaved 38
"Point Break" made it look all too easy. (: **I gave myself brownie points because I can name all the presidents' masks!(:
Octwo 16
OP, are you retarded? You're retarded aren't you.
THE_A_TEEN 28
What I don't get is why people like you use the word "retard" as an insult.
Octwo 16
The same reason people use "fag" to mean something other than a homosexual person. The meaning of insulting words today have changed in context over the years. I wouldn't call a mentally disabled person a "retard" but I will call someone who is obviously a bleeding idiot one.
T1A2Z3 35
Are you asking a question? You didn't end with a question mark, did you.
AmethystRain 20
If I worked in a bank and someone pulled a gun on me, you can bet your ass I'd press the alarm, no matter the person's age. And to those of you defending the parent, give me a break. It's a responsible parent's job to know what's in their 8 year old child's pockets.
RitRit 20
True, anyone with common sense would push the alarm. But its not as easy as it sounds to keep track of an 8 year old kid.
Quikraptor 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
It's also a bank tellers job not to be an idiot. The kid is EIGHT. If you can't figure out he's just kidding around, then you have a problem. I've had a TON of toy guns in my time, and I've handled a few real ones. You've got a serious problem if you can't tell the difference between those either. Fyl, OP. Don't listen to these stupid neckbeards.
AmethystRain 20
How many stories do we read about kids getting into their parents' guns and bringing them to school? It could have easily been a real gun and the person getting it pulled in their face from behind a counter isn't going to stop and ask if it's a toy. Sounds like you're the dumb "neckbeard" here.
petlover7598 7
Having been held up before the first thing that goes through a mind isn't always is that a fake gun or not. It's going to be oh hell what do I do. Plus, read the news, there are plenty of kids that are less than 8 that get ahold of guns and shoot people. If it looks real it should be taken seriously.
Senseless_487 29
In most places like that, even the suggestion of a weapon warrants a silent alarm. I worked as a cashier at a casino, and someone once told me they had a gun in their pocket, and to give them all my money. You bet your ass I pressed the silent alarm!
unknown_user5566 27
27- That's what I was thinking, regarding the alarm. No matter who was holding the gun (toy or not), I would have pressed the silent out of an automatic reflex. Better safe than sorry. It's not like OP actually got arrested so no harm, no foul.