Today, at my wedding reception, my father began his speech with "Well, I never, ever thought that this day would come," at which point the entire room, including my new husband, broke into a round of enthusiastic applause. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at our wedding reception my new father-in-law gave his speech, saying his little girl was too good for me. Everyone, including my parents, agreed. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband decided it would be a good idea, when he was supposed to do his speech, to stand up and say, "Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please. Genitals. That is all." FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML
Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML
Today, as my husband and I were leaving our wedding reception, my mother-in-law hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You're gonna do great tonight!" FML
Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML
Today, my dad gave a speech at my wedding. It started with, “Forty years ago, there was a tree…” and continued in the same vein about his work as a biologist. I might have been mentioned in passing. My new wife was not. FML
Today, my dad thought it would be appropriate to get drunk at my wedding and include in his father of the bride speech all the very bad things I did as a child, before I got the psychiatric help I needed. My in-laws were giving me death glares, and his nana yelled, “Shame on you!” at me. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
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Top comments
elmyra_duff 0
don't be an idiot. what he meant is he didn't think you'd grow up. that's what parents think. you're always their little daughter.
cucumberfabulous 7
Hahahahaha I wouldn't take that to seriously....I'd laugh too! =)
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Comments (92)
LatinoHeat 0
YDI for having a wild, sexual fantasy about Clay Aiken during your own wedding!
omgwtflolz 0
how the hell is this an fml? take a joke?
lich_fml 0
how the hell is this an FML? yeah, almost all start like that. get over it.
darkangel522 0
#38: I am with you there. I think my dad will say something like that, or worse. And if there's booze at the wedding, then no doubt it will be horrible and will make my cry at my own wedding (and not happy tears).
mcsnelly 5
I really didn't take this as the dad meaning "I can't believe my little girl is grown up and getting married." I thought it definitely sounded more like he's saying "I didn't think she would EVER EVER EVER get married!" And the fact that everyone clapped after that makes it sound more like the second one. I really wouldn't think the OP's husband would be agreeing that he, also, never imagined her to be grown up and getting married instead of being a little girl....
BLNovelist 0
I would actually have to agree. If the father had said it and no one clapped for it - I'd say yeah, it probably was just a 'never thought she'd grow up' sort of comment. But the fact that even the groom applauded? I mean, really, they all didn't view her as a little girl up until that point.
drkwlf 0
Yes they would clap because they were probably congratulating the father on his daughter getting married, durr. ******* idiots wtf.
mcsnelly 5
The groom was congratulating the bride on growing up and getting married?
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0
This FML actually made me more bored. Thanks a lot.
theweirdshipper 0
I have flamed fanfics for this particular reason. Parents, and kids, and /everyone/ jokes about something or another. My father calls my and my brother Smelly. Do I acxtually smell? No, but it's lamely funny. Grow a spine, and some tougher skin, then, maybe, Mommy won't have to hold your hand when you get a booster shot. I'd say you deserve it, but you would probably be better off with a father with a drier personality =(
Mancubus 2
Your father was probably refering to the fact that his little girl is all grown up. Quit being such a drama queen.
oopsie_daisy8446 0
Your life is not effed. You have parents, a new wife, and many people who love you to come to your wedding. If you think that is a bad life, let's switch.
hotpinklovee 0
I just wanted to point out that you don't know how to read. She says that she has a new HUSBAND in the post, not wife. And how do you magically know that her Mom is still alive/still in the picture?
lifeinoz 0
I don't know you, but if these are the words that your father felt would best fit his wedding speech, then you probably deserve it. And your poor husband. Your wedding night must have been great, what with you posting to FML and all. Anullment in 5...4...3...