Today, at my wedding reception, my father began his speech with "Well, I never, ever thought that this day would come," at which point the entire room, including my new husband, broke into a round of enthusiastic applause. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at our wedding reception my new father-in-law gave his speech, saying his little girl was too good for me. Everyone, including my parents, agreed. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband decided it would be a good idea, when he was supposed to do his speech, to stand up and say, "Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please. Genitals. That is all." FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML
Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML
Today, as my husband and I were leaving our wedding reception, my mother-in-law hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You're gonna do great tonight!" FML
Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML
Today, my dad gave a speech at my wedding. It started with, “Forty years ago, there was a tree…” and continued in the same vein about his work as a biologist. I might have been mentioned in passing. My new wife was not. FML
Today, my dad thought it would be appropriate to get drunk at my wedding and include in his father of the bride speech all the very bad things I did as a child, before I got the psychiatric help I needed. My in-laws were giving me death glares, and his nana yelled, “Shame on you!” at me. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
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Top comments
elmyra_duff 0
don't be an idiot. what he meant is he didn't think you'd grow up. that's what parents think. you're always their little daughter.
cucumberfabulous 7
Hahahahaha I wouldn't take that to seriously....I'd laugh too! =)
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Comments (92)
doubleAbattery 0
And you're upset because your dad chose a cliche to start his speech? What? Seriously, I don't get it.
sleepreader 0
no, see, I think that IS the actual FML. It was supposed to go like this, "Today, at my wedding reception, my terribly cheesy dad started his speech with a cliché. Everyone, including my husband, broke into applause like he had said something witty and original. FML." See OP, you just worded it alittle awkwardly. It's okay though, we understand now.
alyzandra 0
This is probably in my "Top 5 Lamest FMLs" category. Jesus.
MadeOfAwesome 1
Yeah, this is just a "I misinterpreted what my parents said" FML. I'm so getting tired of them -_-
screaming_butter 0
Um it's a joke, you know ha ha. I'm so tired of these FML's of people who can't take a joke.
LollyPop1 0
How the . is this an FML??
martialartist7 0
you just got married and u think ur life is f'd?? cmon be happy about it. that was just a fathers way of saying he cant believe his little girl grew up so fast
lifesucks9596 0
OOOH HONEYMOON MUST'VE SUCKED FOR YOU HUSBAND
sleepreader 0
yea, it's hard to have honeymoon sex when you can't get your new wife's panties out of a bunch.
owloohs 0
i think she's upset because everyone broke out into applause after he said it.
philly8608 0
I hope your husband told you to put on your "big girl panties" after hearing about how this upset you. Learn to take a friggin' joke, no one honestly thought you'd never get married. Although, good luck to your husband, his wife has the maturity of a 13 princess.
philly8608 0
Year old*
simplyn2deep 2
I don't see how that's either. my mom said it at her only son's wedding and it was translated into Spanish so the Bride's family could understand! learn to take a joke! at your dad's next milestone birthday, make fun of his age and how he has a weak bladder and your mom will have to change his diapers or something.