Today, as I was watching a DVD, I noticed a spider crawling on my crotch area. So, I panicked and smashed the spider, smashing my nuts in the process. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML
Today, as I was using my mom's computer, a spider crawled onto the screen. So as per my usual reaction to seeing a spider, I smashed it as fast as I could. I missed the spider, but now I have to buy my mom a new monitor. FML
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
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Top comments
breenarae25 0
that's why u FLICK it , not smack it... duhh
Trevv 0
You'd be amazed at how stupid people can be... This is nothing.
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Comments (145)
lolzfmlz 0
thats crap that didnt happen its not possible for anyone to be that stupid
Trevv 0
You'd be amazed at how stupid people can be... This is nothing.
redbluegreen 41
#5 - I know. Isn't that one of the given rules about being a guy? I'm a girl and even I know that. #18 - Hahaha WTF?
pat2rome 0
What balls? Didn't you say you freaked out about a spider?
yeswatson 0
haha
uneekfreak16 0
haha#22 I think this is what #18 is talking about :P http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUbWjIKxrrs
Kristoffer 35
YDI for "panicking" about a spider. I'm not saying it was definitely a harmless spider, but you don't panic, you gotta stay calm and resolve the situation rationally instead of sexually assaulting yourself.
fmkittw 0
you smashed the nuts you were eating as you watched your DVD correct?
I2OI3 0
people are too scared of spiders, and not scared enough about becoming infertile.
your_face 15
I agree with #17. Spiders can be freaky, but really... learn to stay calm and get rid of it. I'm sorry, but I'm kind of bitter about guys who freak out over spiders (not that girls are any better; no one should flip out when they see a tiny insect or spider, unless they know it's poisonous). My boyfriend always gets scared and makes me take care of them, and I think it's ridiculous. Yeah, I like to freak out a little too - but not so much that I can't think clearly to either kill & flush it, or scoop it up and toss it outside where it belongs. i can't even say not to be such a chicken, because a chicken would probably just eat the darn thing.
teebonehead 0
What a freaking wussy .....stand up and brush it off ....WTF is it going to do bite your tiny little tool !