Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, while trying to kill a spider in my kitchen, I thought it would be wise to throw a bottle at it. The bottle hit the wall, bounced off the fridge and hit me in the face. The lucky spider crawled away, and is surely still laughing somewhere. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
WithaKay 4
Why were you trying to get it to climb up the wall? You should've just killed the thing.
BWill9014 4
And this is why I fear spiders... because thy can jump on you :l
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (106)
4ll4b0utm3 0
ROFL YAY
mfmylifesrsly 30
not yay! what's worse is when you're in the shower getting your freaky on and then you notice a cockroach climbing on the shower curtains :(
maa_rico 4
In soviet russia.... people just would have killed the spider.
dolphincheddar 10
yea.. killing it would have solved the problem. and I dunno about roaches but the first half maybe
KleenexWaffle 3
22 If you were 'Getting your freaky on' in the shower, then I'm sure the cockroach was just trying to get front row seats to the show. I know I would have wanted to watch too.
MissBunny25 0
what's worse is when a fuzzy caterpillar jumps on you and spits stuff on you. D:
tsim_fml 0
23 - nooo. In soviet russia spider kills you!
mintcar 10
il
PeteyPablo12308 20
EW!!!! I HATE spiders!
emi3611 0
ew! I would've started to cry!
seventy5cent 0
I would of smacked that bitch with the back of my hand, the spider that is :)
dre_bro11 12
35, did it turn you on? Cause that shit sound sexy.
izzie321 27
In Soviet, Russia, spider keep you as pet.
WithaKay 4
Why were you trying to get it to climb up the wall? You should've just killed the thing.
tona01 16
because OP is a dumbass
kaylanicole1255 1
YDI! I would have killed it!! And Im deathly afraid of spiders!
juliahockey 0
agree with 3. what a dumbass. "let's scare a spider to crawl up a wall! yea that's smarter then killing it!"
FlixDoom 0
YOU guys are... read again the spider was on the POSTER... would have ruined it to just squash the spider on it
skinnydude0 1
you can wipe the guts off
yuggi1 11
I know right?! I always call my mom over to kill it. I'm a pussy, I know.
AppleCurry 0
51-I used to do the same thing. now I'm in college an just scream until the guy in the apartment next to me runs over. I think he's getting tired of it though.
kitteh_noodles 2
33-but if u think about it,ur killing it straight away so there won't be any pain
bignasty29 0
My thoughts Exactly
MwahFMLS 6
lollol me too #71 :)
Konarika 11
omg, why would you kill an innocent animal just like that?! If anything, take it outside...
RyDawg918 0
wow how terribul.
FMLsOhilarious 6
What does "terribul" mean?
ori0324 1
huge fail...
lolmyendoff456 7
Rofl omg yea it was ...
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
I would be so afraid. Unfortunately, spiders are my biggest fear. I'm also afraid of killing them. It is so inconvenient when there's one in my house.
tookietookie123 5
They said your are always within 5 feet of atleast one spider
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
Yeah I heard that statistic, but I immediately went into denial and listened to calming music. That's just how I deal with news that upsets me.
Paigeyk 3
its said you swallow at least 8 spiders a year unknowingly
marriiee_fml 0
you go charlotte.
BWill9014 4
And this is why I fear spiders... because thy can jump on you :l
Suadmonkey 0
then shoot them with your glock.
SchiTzenGiglez 0
you racist
briidontgive_ 0
Hah, I thought I was the only one that's happened to before.
techweed 12
that's the thing, it did
iAmPaul 49
13 - NO THIS IS SPARTA!! (my profile picture) ;) :P
Leebra 6
At least it didn't go in your mouth, right?
BooGhosted 0
spiderman's apprentice came for you!!
noornia 6
LOL XD