Today, an old man started telling me about the high price of meat. I told him I wouldn't know, since I'm a vegetarian. His reply was, "Oh, most vegetarians are slimmer." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML
Today, despite feeling healthier than ever, losing fat, gaining muscle and having perfect blood results, my morbidly obese relatives keep telling me that my new vegan diet is "unhealthy". FML
Today, the unhealthiest person I know, weighing in at around 350 pounds told me she was now a vegan. I then told her the Cheese-Itz, as well as the leather boots she was wearing wasn't vegan. She said I was wrong. I'm a nutritionist. FML
Today, I was taking a customer's order when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted, "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML
Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Today, a customer bitched me out, saying he wouldn't eat his vegetarian dish because it didn't "look vegetarian enough." He then demanded a refund and a plate of the same vegetarian dish. FML
Today, a coworker complimented me on losing weight, and said that she wished she could drop a few pounds too. I was too embarrassed to tell her that the only reason I've lost weight is because I haven't been able to afford to eat. FML
Today, I saw an attractive, thin woman eating a salad. Trying to be smooth, I approached her and told her that she didn't need to eat so scarcely, because she was beautiful. She promptly gave me a dirty look and informed me that she was a vegetarian. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man asking for money for food. Not wanting to give him money so he'd spend it on booze, I decided to buy him a full big mac meal from McDonalds. When I went to hand it to him, he quickly waved his hand, denying it saying, "Thanks but I'm a vegetarian". FML
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Top comments
Blue_Eyed_Beast 7
How do you know if someone is a vegetarian? Don't worry, they'll tell you...
Ninjafriends 1
He should know that cows eat grass, and are still fatties like you.
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Comments (79)
glitter354 0
OP- my food poops on your food.
BlaiseTheCraze 0
just because you can't afford meat, doesn't make you a vegetarian
varkey 7
that doesn't necessarily mean you wouldn't know about meat prices... many people who eat meat just get their spouses/parents to buy it, and don't know the prices, while many people who follow the economy (like me, and possibly this old man) follow prices of common commodities like meat, regardless of whether they actually consume them...
idontknow1111 0
Old people are crazy sometimes...
Stupidpeopleanno 5
#14, so your saying I can gain 15 pounds a day? AWESOME!
beccusmaximus 0
Going vegan will do it, though. There's a lot of fats in cheese and milk and such. Plus, it'll give you psychic powers! ;)
brokenhelix 4
old man rivers FTW!!!
Brittneyyyy 7
I know a lot of overweight vegetarians. Vegetarian =/= vegetables only. Most of them eat crap food like icecream, chips, candy, and excessive amounts of pasta-type foods. Carbohydrate overload. I'm not looking down upon vegetarians but many of them are overweight and/or unhealthy.
katplayer 4
Chubby vegetarian represent! I actually like the combo myself though. Most people assume veg*ns are stick thin, malnourished, and unhealthy. Being a bit husky shows them that not every veg*n doesn't eat enough. Though really, I am slimmer in not giving a crap about counting calories while being vegetarian than I was doing the same and eating meat. I used to weigh around 155, but now I'm just a pinch over 130. Which is totally okay with me, I know how to not show it too much. ;D
bighead5890 0
Hahahaha did u jus start ydi