Today, an old man started telling me about the high price of meat. I told him I wouldn't know, since I'm a vegetarian. His reply was, "Oh, most vegetarians are slimmer." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML
Today, despite feeling healthier than ever, losing fat, gaining muscle and having perfect blood results, my morbidly obese relatives keep telling me that my new vegan diet is "unhealthy". FML
Today, the unhealthiest person I know, weighing in at around 350 pounds told me she was now a vegan. I then told her the Cheese-Itz, as well as the leather boots she was wearing wasn't vegan. She said I was wrong. I'm a nutritionist. FML
Today, I was taking a customer's order when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted, "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML
Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Today, a customer bitched me out, saying he wouldn't eat his vegetarian dish because it didn't "look vegetarian enough." He then demanded a refund and a plate of the same vegetarian dish. FML
Today, a coworker complimented me on losing weight, and said that she wished she could drop a few pounds too. I was too embarrassed to tell her that the only reason I've lost weight is because I haven't been able to afford to eat. FML
Today, I saw an attractive, thin woman eating a salad. Trying to be smooth, I approached her and told her that she didn't need to eat so scarcely, because she was beautiful. She promptly gave me a dirty look and informed me that she was a vegetarian. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man asking for money for food. Not wanting to give him money so he'd spend it on booze, I decided to buy him a full big mac meal from McDonalds. When I went to hand it to him, he quickly waved his hand, denying it saying, "Thanks but I'm a vegetarian". FML
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Top comments
Blue_Eyed_Beast 7
How do you know if someone is a vegetarian? Don't worry, they'll tell you...
Ninjafriends 1
He should know that cows eat grass, and are still fatties like you.
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Comments (79)
fearfulsymmetry 1
Your posts are always being thumbed down. Probably because they're so tasteless and vulgar. Which may be why I like them so much...
Calyx_fml 22
You can eat 100 twinkes a day and be vegetarian.
XxFYLxX7433 0
I know right
RosiePatosie 0
ouch
Loserly 0
I'm a starchatarian, or a carbivore. Mmmm, cake!
InBetweenDreams 0
Vegetarians can still be fat. Eating too many refined carbs and processed foods will do that to you.
kileyxelizabethh 4
haha 14 I agree
zzzBOLTzzz 1
Your life is not ****** op, he just stated a fact, and he wasn't even rude, he didn't even call you fat, he called you fatter than the average vegitarians, which should be equavalant to the average non-vegitarian. Oh got, the fml these days...
InnocentLies 0
and if she doesn't like the way she looks she can do exercise.
daddy15 0
ydi for being fat. grab a bike or run fatty.
Shorty_Shaza 5
I used to be a very healthy person... Until I committed carbicide...