Today, after years of marriage and my lazy husband letting himself go, I can now finish a bottle of wine and still be sober. This means I've built immunity to the last thing that can make me want to have sex with him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife told me alcohol gives me "increased confidence without increased ability." FML
Today, I realized that I’ve been slowly staying later and later at work, then having a glass of wine before bed to avoid my husband, because we mostly fight whenever we see each other now. FML
Today, after I divorced my husband because of his extreme alcoholism, he's now sober and got his life together and I see the man I fell madly in love with. Apparently, getting better for revenge meant more than getting better for the marriage. FML
Today, after I was surprised by my husband announcing he was coming off the drink and going to the gym to get in shape, I found out that I've been such a fool, as it turns out the pre-workout shakes he kept making contained about 5 shots of vodka, so he could drink at home without me moaning. FML
Today, after close to 10 years of marriage, my wife’s health has improved enough she is craving sex again. Just not with me. FML
Today, I've lost weight, given up beer, soda, and fast food, finished the house project backlog, cleaned the house, and gotten the kids on a chore regimen over the past seven months, all things my wife asked me to do to reduce her stress and revive her sex drive. Oh wait… she still won't have sex. FML
Today, if I want to be sexually attracted to my wife, I need to be very drunk, but if I'm very drunk there's about a 2/3 chance I'll have whisky dick. Before you ask, we've been married over 40 years, so there's no point in divorcing, we've been together too long, so who else would want to shag us except each other? FML
Today, it's been twelve years, seven months, and fifteen days since my wife has wanted sex. She was drunk. She no longer drinks. Guess my name is Job now and I have to be patient. FML
Today, I am exhausted and can barely move after being up all night taking care of my drunk and vomiting husband. He, on the other hand, feels much better and is bounding with energy. FML
Today, my wife was finally in the mood after 150+ attempts to seduce her and I was drunk to keep it up. Now she's upset and thinks I'm not attracted to her. FML
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Top comments
LuluRichards 20
Maybe marriage counselling is worth a try?
Nimmrodel 11
That was one depressing read. Maybe time to seek help; that's not healthy for you or him.
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Comments (104)
Evil_Wench 16
Yes. You turned to alcohol rather than communicating and trying to fix your marriage and that's HIS fault. Sounds like it's time to grow up and learn that there's more to love than physical attraction.
bobslawnservice 16
You kind of deserve it. You need to communicate these issues with your partner before they become this basd instead of just trying to drink your problems away.
weveallbeenthere 30
tell him to shape up or get the **** out.
vikky538 29
you can either change your husband or change the liquor you drink...either way it works..but the decision is yours..
BeepBeepSwerve 9
change the husband,the choice is yours??? isn't it HIS choice?
TheBookWyrm 18
Divorce,
blueknight1st 26
No, what it means is you are now an alcoholic. You didn't "build an immunity" to anything you just think that the way you feel when drunk is normal now. Divorce the guy and get yourself in AA.
DanielleinDC 34
You and your husband definitely need some counseling. You may also need to go to AA if you're drinking a bottle of wine every night; it sounds as if you are addicted. You should not have to get drunk to want to have sex with your husband. Get help--or try. And if that doesn't work, as someone else suggested, a divorce might not be so bad. It sounds as if you guys have grown way, way apart.
Guardian88 21
Add another bottle to the list!!
infectedsense 15
If communication between you guys is THAT bad, why are you married? Be honest with the guy, he might actually WANT to get back in shape for you.
guyssite 4
Pretty sure that being the kind of person who would go on the internet to call your husband lazy while bragging about your tolerance for large amounts of alcohol is more of the reason why things aren't right with your marriage than your husband putting on a few pounds.