Today, my boyfriend brought up the time he said he'd love me until the day he died. He continued by saying, "So, let's just pretend I died today." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to marry me and be the father of my children. Five minutes later, he told me he wants to experience death. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 5 years spent a whole hour making me promise that if he ever died, I would never try to find someone else. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me during a funeral. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted to tell me how much he loves me. He said a lot of wonderful things, such as not being able to live without me and hoping that I would want to live with him and marry him someday. He ended his loving speech with his ex-girlfriend's name instead of mine. FML
Today, after a tiff with my boyfriend, I said to him, "You could at least PRETEND to love me sometimes." He responded with, "I do pretend to love you!" FML
Today, after losing his job, I reassured my boyfriend by telling him I'd rather be with him living in a cardboard box than to be without him. He responded by telling me he'd rather be dead. FML
Today, in the same sentence, my boyfriend told me that he wanted to "spend the rest of his life with me," and "I want to break up with you because I can't face your family." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend paid a guy to tell me he was dead. FML
Today, it's the five year anniversary of my father's death. I was cuddling with my boyfriend and crying about how much I missed him. He replied with, "Sometimes, I think you just like to hear yourself talk." FML
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Top comments
_ebbonyy 11
Make his dream come true and kill him then. :)
darwinism 30
Just say "Oh, shit! I thought you died years ago. Your're brother has been consoling me for ages"
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Comments (99)
_ebbonyy 11
Make his dream come true and kill him then. :)
RayRod 6
Cop: "So, he just accidentally stabbed himself then fell out the window?" Op: "......yeah......"
YoungMisfit 9
Bitches are getting crazier everyday.
yahoowizard 16
Combined with your display picture, you look like you have an evil smile as you say that
JennyyMeepMonroe 10
I have to agree with you xD What he said made him sound like such an ass.
ReesieBanana21 12
Let's hope he dies today! And maybe he will.. >:)
SparkieSwag 0
Wow, what a jerk.
ilovesuju 10
OP freak him out by saying " hmmmm perrrfect, I will be seeing you VERY soon" with an evil grin on your face
lebronesque73091 12
Do people not know how to break up with someone the proper way? That's terrible.
doctorhook86 25
An FML by stupid people for stupid people. Don't make lame, unrealistic promises just to try to sound romantic, especially if there's still a "1" at the front of your age. Don't be surprised if others break the aforementioned type of bullshit promises.
riax 9
I agree with the doc! young ppl these days... Lol! they fall head over heels and think its true love that will last forever ´-_-` I feel sorry for op, but there are a lot of guys, and girls, who don't take relationships srsly, especially at the younger ages
st0815 9
Nothing wrong with breaking up, but he didn't have to do it by reminding her of saying that.
knockout702 0
Then you can pretend to care he died :)
_ebbonyy 11
ruthless
memob123 0
^ you're the one saying to kill the guy
_ebbonyy 11
Hahah touché :)
glitterme 5
Then let's just pretend today is the day you killed him.....or we don't have to pretend.
JennaMarie420 2
Stab him and say **** zombies
DracoSpirita 21
What?
SwordOfTheSky 4
She means that if they're pretending he's dead and he's talking to her, he would be a zombie.
dubstep12 8
Oh no! Bath salts:/
Krirn 21
Pretend he wrote up a will leaving all his possessions to you, sounds like fair play to me.
reallytho3 11
Thts wat they want you to think...
reallytho3 11
Thts wat they want you to think...
kzxvazure 0
I thumbed the down the comment with 2 thumbs so it can be even to the one below :D
SqueakyChipmunk 22
If they want us to think that you're illiterate, they have succeeded.
FMLCat2001 4
Lol. Just Made it equal. XD -1+
mariah_victoria 0
Dude I'm just saying I love you -.- SOOO muchhhhh
testtest2_fml 16
So romantic..
KM96 24
Or not ... It's actually the opposite. But whatever because your taste in romance might be very different to mine ...
PlaySpades 21
I'm pretty sure 10 meant that as sarcasm....
darwinism 30
Just say "Oh, shit! I thought you died years ago. Your're brother has been consoling me for ages"
darwinism 30
Let's just pretend that the classic "you're" just died.
Shit_talkin_chik 5
Yeee! Ultimate response to the situation! It is what I was thinking about saying but you took out step further than I would've, I was gonna say friend. Ha! Love the **** the brother response!
mypanda_fml 0
That's not cool. Well instead of pretending you could kill him
_Peppermint_ 34
I hate it when guys say stupid things and think they can get away with it.
Lilwolfyyy 0
I'm not going to argue, but it's hard to break up with someone. I personally thought that op's boyfriend didn't want to hurt her but didn't know any other way to do it.
Ajwc101 24
A real man would tell the truth. In the least hurtful way of course.
Shit_talkin_chik 5
Women say stupid shit too! My girl told me she was straight, too bad, a month later I ran into her with another woman that she was clearly being More than friends with!