Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, in the middle of sex, I was desperate for a fart but tried to hold it in so we weren't forced to stop halfway. Unfortunately, I accidentally let the fart escape, along with runny diarrhea, all over my husband's legs and groin. The smell caused him to vomit all over me. FML
Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML
Today, while I was in the shower, my boyfriend decided to join me. We were really getting into it and he attempted to lift me up. Not only did I let out a massive fart, he slipped and fell on top of me. He won't stop laughing. FML
Today, my husband fell asleep on my shoulder. He then ripped a nasty fart. I exhaled slowly but apparently loud enough that it woke up my husband who promptly screamed directly in my ear, before screaming a second time when he smelled the fart as well. The worst part is that also he scared my cat off my lap. FML
Today, as my husband normally initiates sex and sometimes I want to but always chicken out, I was feeling brave and did so. After he came, he continued working on me and I farted. I embarrassingly apologized and he said it was ok and kept going. I then continued to fart, and I had to stop. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
Today, my husband farted while he was naked and bending over to pick up his clothes, so me lying on the bed got a perfect view of his butthole twitching and flapping around as the gas escaped. Who says romance is dead? FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
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Top comments
Phustercluck 11
I would think, since you're married, you would be passed the 'fart barrier.'
shakey23 1
you sure there wasn't a little bit of shart?
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Comments (132)
MrBond007_fml 6
I would have been so turned on... but this is fake girls don't fart... hah bullshit detector works!!!
Cenobyte 10
lmao Why did you fart on his leg? The last time my bf farted on me, I did more than just make a noise. Now he is very careful to point his arse in a different direction. ;)
yazmi_09 3
lmao win!
SpaceMannn 0
Well did you get it off?..
Cenobyte 10
No, but his farts are like toxic gas. Need bleach and a wire brush to get that shit off. :P
TardxxxCake 4
FYL OP. I feel bad for you since your husband hasn't grown the **** up yet. Like really...
dezinspaaace 0
now, how old is ur husband op? :/
I_R_Genius 3
Everyone needs to quit saying that OP's husband needs to grow up or how old is he? Seriously, he was just messing around with OP as a joke. If you can't get a sense of humor, then you shouldn't come onto the site. SMFH..
valri3 0
True. Most of these FMLs are just people messing around, people just seem to take it to seriously...
afdude87 6
just morons entertaining the troll.
pimpcakes2 11
Bah-hahahahaha! Hilarious!
Uchilah 0
anything comes after the fart?