Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, we rearranged the bedroom and my boyfriend and I switched sides of the bed. When the alarm went off, he got confused as to which side the clock was on. Instead of hitting the snooze button like he normally does, he hit me in the face. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend making the bed, at 2 AM. And he wasn't so much making the bed as he was holding a pillow while lost in thought, looking at me. FML
Today, after not being able to sleep for two hours because my boyfriend wouldn't stop talking, he fell asleep and I was left wide awake. I listened to him snore for another three hours and only got a couple of hours sleep. He's not working today, but I am. FML
Today, my boyfriend elbowed me in the eye while we were sleeping. His excuse: "You shouldn't have stayed over." FML
Today, my partner got mad at me for forgetting to turn off the bedroom light when coming back from brushing my teeth, and has chosen to sleep in our spare bedroom over it. FML
Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML
Today, my girl and I got in a huge fight. Because I cuddled with her the wrong way. While I was asleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend kicked me out of bed so the dog could get under the covers. FML
Today, in the midst of sleep, my boyfriend hurled my cellphone across the room and into the wall because he couldn't be bothered to pick up or hang up an incoming call. FML
Today, my boyfriend got irrationally pissed at me because his cat decided to sit on my lap instead of his. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Sounds like his side of the bed SHOULD be the couch.
foreverhurt 6
Looks like someone's going though that time of the month...
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Comments (140)
1R1X0X0 10
Time for a new boyfriend..
alki_fml 5
Time you traded in your boyfriend for a real man.
Ugi 27
What is the point of sharing a bed if you are going to sleep apart? It seems to me that there is some intimacy missing between you here. Are you sure he considers you to be his girlfriend and not just a sex-toy?
Fumimi 0
You can't do better than him? Come on! If he's like that, imagine what a snit he'll be in when you eventually walk in on him and his boyfriend...
oxygenius 14
Is "Anonymous" short for Amy Farrah Fowler? And is your boyfriend called Sheldon Cooper?
spottyblanket 8
Get him some sleeping pills, he sounds like a light sleeper. Knock the bugger out and he won't complain.
nuggetman213 0
Make fun of him, Don't let him forget how stupid he was
LMAO_atLife 8
Ditch this guy fast! Search the Internet for the check list of physical and emotional abusers and you will probably find he meets most of the criteria.
CessnaPilot 5
Sounds like he is OCD.
lemonademixer 7
Stop letting your pillows touch his side of the bed bitch just kidding