Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, we rearranged the bedroom and my boyfriend and I switched sides of the bed. When the alarm went off, he got confused as to which side the clock was on. Instead of hitting the snooze button like he normally does, he hit me in the face. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend making the bed, at 2 AM. And he wasn't so much making the bed as he was holding a pillow while lost in thought, looking at me. FML
Today, after not being able to sleep for two hours because my boyfriend wouldn't stop talking, he fell asleep and I was left wide awake. I listened to him snore for another three hours and only got a couple of hours sleep. He's not working today, but I am. FML
Today, my boyfriend elbowed me in the eye while we were sleeping. His excuse: "You shouldn't have stayed over." FML
Today, my partner got mad at me for forgetting to turn off the bedroom light when coming back from brushing my teeth, and has chosen to sleep in our spare bedroom over it. FML
Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML
Today, my girl and I got in a huge fight. Because I cuddled with her the wrong way. While I was asleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend kicked me out of bed so the dog could get under the covers. FML
Today, in the midst of sleep, my boyfriend hurled my cellphone across the room and into the wall because he couldn't be bothered to pick up or hang up an incoming call. FML
Today, my boyfriend got irrationally pissed at me because his cat decided to sit on my lap instead of his. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Sounds like his side of the bed SHOULD be the couch.
foreverhurt 6
Looks like someone's going though that time of the month...
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Comments (140)
n1988e 8
How old is he again?!
Awsumuzzie 12
Why is everyone, but the OP of the comment, so full of fail? Holy crap. I admire your sarcasm.
Hiphuray4peas 27
Sounds abusive to me. Perhaps he's not worth sleeping with.
lululatenight 28
No, just no. there IS no guys side of the bed. It's all yours girl
hermitknut 22
You're dating Sheldon?
Hizodge 4
Might be a long shot, but it sounds like you two could just possibly have some relationship troubles.
mykelinva 4
He sounds like a stickler for details. So, I would recommend that you ensure that nothing of his touches anything of yours. Penetration, however slight, would be enough to violate this agreement. Help him to understand with a container of hand lotion....
LexieWins 0
The only time I feel pure hate is when people disrupt my sleep so I can't blame him. Haha get a bigger bed!
TheComputerGuy96 16
*plays "Wide Awake" song*
metmimo 8
Sounds like something my husband does...and yes he loves to sleep on the couch