Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to a big job interview. Everything went well at first, with the interviewer being impressed by my CV. I was then interrogated over not having a Facebook account, and practically accused of being a criminal, because people without them "always have something to hide". FML
Today, I complained about being bored to death on Facebook. Someone took it as a suicide threat and called the police. They showed up at my apartment and my workplace. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for having Facebook open at work. That's fine, I closed it and continued on with my work. In a meeting later on I could see the reflection of my boss's laptop screen in a mirror behind her desk. For two hours, I watched her scroll through her Facebook feed. FML
Today, my horrible boss sent me a Facebook friend request for the fifth time, in her attempt to not only bother me at work, but also through social media. FML
Today, I was caught going on Facebook at work. I was called into my boss's office to be reprimanded, and while he was lecturing me on the importance of staying focussed and the misuse of company property, his computer beeped. It was his Facebook chat notifying him of a new message. FML
Today, at the library, somebody left themselves logged in to Facebook on a public computer after they had left. Trying to teach them a lesson, I updated their Facebook status to something outrageous. That's when they came back to the computer after getting something from the printer. FML
Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for visiting Facebook on my work computer. He says that since I can't be trusted, I'll be supervised from now on. I was uploading pictures to the company's Facebook page, which I have to do once a week as part of my job. FML
Today, I found out my husband has a fake Facebook account that he uses to add guys and live a double life as some kind of "gamer chick". This would be disturbing enough, even if he hadn't used pictures of me to give a face to his alter ego. FML
Today, it was a coworker's last day. Over the last 6 months, he has been talking smack about me because he assumed I'd ratted him out for a Facebook post, ranting about our place of employment. I decided to confront him after work to let him know that I didn't do it. He then reported me for harassment to all of my supervisors. FML
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Top comments
MindFreakazoid 10
Because, friend, without nutjobs, who do we have to make most FMLs about?
bigtaytay 13
They're alive to troll
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Comments (129)
stormchaser24 24
The CIA has admitted to using Facebook to spy/get information on people.
Levvy 22
When did looking at information people have voluntarily placed in a public venue become "spying", exactly? That's like saying that seeing other people who've come out into public while you're at the store is spying on them.
aribari373 5
I wouldn't have stood there and smiled
lucidpattern 6
Well it IS true, you dimwit. Why are uncharacteristic twats with no brain like YOU even alive?
Levvy 22
So, you're saying the CIA needs to go through the agonizing trouble of setting up an elaborate and expensive front... in order to get information they're already empowered to request from the social security administration for free.
t0rnadeau 4
Mark zuckerberg did win the c.i.a surveillance medal but its not social security information but intelligence gathering. Instead of brutally ripping on these claims so some research. Don't be ignorant
Levvy 22
You're saying his friend was technically wrong, but that the OP was still wrong to doubt him. Think about that.
oxygenius 14
like these*
Levvy 22
Smile and nod.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Should've told him to shove it!
vbmg152 19
YDI for having a FB! People can find out lots about you from it!
Sirin_fml 47
Your FML profile is the exception, obviously.
chosha_fml 27
YDI for politely listening for 30min and not shutting him down the moment he started making wrong assumptions.
alishous 8
The only one assuming is the general public, in believing that this country can exist without close observation, manipulation, and blatant control of its citizens.
Will0825 2
To vote for presidents...