Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I started an electrical fire trying to charge my vibrators. FML
Today, I came home from work and found my sister using my vibrator in my own bed. FML
Today, I discovered my children had found my vibrator and buried it in the cat's litter box. FML
Today, while I was at my job as senior care, I was in a client's home vacuuming the carpet and found a very used vibrator that belonged to his wife. It wasn't clean. FML
Today, while working in a dark nightclub, I dropped a red charger. Retracing my steps, I found it, or so I thought until I picked up a used tampon. FML
Today, at work, my vibrator rolled out of my bag so far down the table that I couldn’t catch it, and had to run round the table to grab it by leaning between two of my male coworkers. That vibrator lives under my bed, so the only way it could've got in my work bag would be my boyfriend pranking me. FML
Today, I ran out of underwear and so I went into my mom's drawer to borrow a pair from her. It was then that I found out my mom uses the same vibrator as I do. FML
Today, I bought my first ever vibrator after months of wanting one. Apparently, I bought a cheap product, because it broke and started going off by itself later. It shook my whole dresser while my best friend and I were in the room. I couldn't get it to shut off. FML
Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I see her in the hall, she just cracks up and makes jokes about how I can't get a guy, so I have to rely on electronics. What's worse, she told my dad AND posted a status on facebook about it. FML
Today, I bought my first vibrator. I was really excited, until my crippling OCD kicked in, forcing me to turn it on and off seven times in rapid succession, causing it to give off a cracking sound and stop working. Now I'm sad. FML
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Top comments
Onyxdragon 9
That's a new one, you get a gold sticker.
llamarrama01 21
People who do things like that can go....**** themselves
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Comments (134)
lulinator 40
I'm the opposite. I stole the batteries out of my vibrator to put in my daughter's LeapPad. Mom of the year.
Chilupa 28
Me too! My son's drill needed them more.
Nathan_h24 17
So Canadians really are that nice
lulinator 40
We totally are. Sacrificing our own pleasure so our kids don't scream at us.
cookies2228 3
not trevor phillips mr.109
Steve95401 49
BOB (Battery Operated Boyfriend) thanks you.
missyfiona89 28
You're a poor, horny and cheap bitch.
Tsukiyomi 16
Die
missyfiona89 28
YDI for not being able to get laid and having to resort to low moves like that.
Noreason89 6
That's a bit harsh
PhilSnake22 13
They deserve it for not being able to get laid? This bitch serious?
weveallbeenthere 30
she didn't say she couldn't get laid. maybe she has a very strong sex drive and her partner doesn't or can't go 3 rounds.
brand125 17
19 - you dumb?
rocker_chick23 27
You know married women, lesbian couples, and women who have boyfriends, usually have vibrators, right? They aren't just for single women.
Mattlozano12 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Good Vibesss
unkhammun 5
Excellent profile pic!
Mattlozano12 15
Why thank you!
napoleod 8
I see nothing wrong with this
cookies2228 3
i guess as long as she replaces or puts them back
guinea_pigs 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Sacrificing a child's happiness for your own pleasure.. YDI, OP. But the fact that you realize it's wrong makes me hate you a little less.
JBrownie123 24
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Please tell me you didn't use it then and there...
rocker_chick23 27
I am sure OP waited until she got home to use it.
SAspring 17
Most likely be in the news if she were to do that..
JBrownie123 24
It's called a joke...
Ihavegas 22
do rechargeable vibrators exist?
DavidKnows 11
#33.....Yes. They are called men. They're less expensive than batteries, you can pick one up anywhere, and discard once they're used a few times.
alyssabreanne90 16
Yes, and they are more expensive than the other vibrators.
allplayedout 20
And if you're looking for a long term, more effective solution, you could try one that plugs directly into the wall like the Magic Wand...or just buy some rechargeable batteries.