Today, my new boyfriend said I’m only allowed three male friends, and their names are, “the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.” When I told him he was quoting Will Ferrell, I realized he was born in Croatia and doesn’t know who that is. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was introduced to friends of my boyfriend as, "My other girlfriend." FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me as a friend to one of his friends. FML
Today, I found out that me having a boyfriend is an on-going family joke. FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML
Today, I was introducing my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. I meant to say, "Mom, Dad, this is Tom." Instead, I said, "Mom, Dad, this is Mom." My boyfriend is now jokingly reconsidering our relationship, and my parents won't stop making fun of me. FML
Today, I found out that my parents think my boyfriend is the devil. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend didn’t know what quotation marks are. He’s 34. FML
Today, my boyfriend mansplained to me that because Loki likes both boys and girls, he’s bi, not gay. I’m bi, and my boyfriend knows this. FML
Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend was introducing me to some business partners. As he was going along telling me their names, when he introduced me, he called me by my best friend's name. FML
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Top comments
Razath 17
Unless he's joking, throw him to the street immediately.
lgrave 8
Run girl, run!
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Comments (7)
Razath 17
Unless he's joking, throw him to the street immediately.
faiona 13
My boyfriend is Croatian and 1) certainly knows who Will Ferrell is and 2) would never say such bullshit. Dump his ass.
lgrave 8
Run girl, run!
BurnInDemonFire 39
Not sure why someone from Croatia wouldn't know who Will Ferrell is, but I'd like to know why your mind went there before it went to the usual bible nonsense?
Yudith 28
If you decide to keep your ball-and-chain of a boyfriend, I'd highly recomment that you rename your most attractive guy friends "The Father", "The Son", and "The Holy Ghost". And rename your best girl friend "The Virgin Mary" while you're at it.
tiptoppc 21
I only believe in the Holy Fonze and the book of “Eeeeh!!!”