Today, while driving with my step mother, she attempted to have phone sex with my dad. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, my wife and I were doing it when the phone rang. She answered it, and rode me while carrying on a more than a five minute conversation with her father. FML
Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend called me and asked me if I wanted to have phone sex with her. We got into it. It took us 13 minutes to figure out my mom had been on the other line the whole time. FML
Today, I had to share a car with my dad and stepmother. My stepmother managed to get hammered at lunch and spent the hour-long car trip drunkenly mistaking the heating controls for the radio. FML
Today, I had to listen to my mother flirting on the phone with my dad's new girlfriend's ex-husband. FML
Today, I had to listen to my mom give a detailed description of her date last night to her friends via speakerphone... while I was trapped in the car with her. When I pointed out that I was still in the back seat, she scoffed and told me, "I have a sex life, deal with it." FML
Today, I went out of town with my mother-in-law. I don't know what possessed her to start questioning me about her son's and my sex life. When I told her I wasn't talking about that, she began to discuss her and my father-in-law's bedroom habits. The car ride was two hours. FML
Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML
Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say, "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML
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Top comments
ThogTheCaveman 7
While it's driving? You're right, great idea. What could possibly go wrong with getting out of a moving car? Dear God, are you trying to destroy my faith in humanity?
denvan 0
Wow your face must've been a Kodak moment.
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Comments (199)
moosemammoth 5
Speaker phone anyone ;)
Every1luvsfmls 6
ydi for making her horny
polysyllabist 3
^ exactly, or a one line "what are you wearing" without the context of hearing the dad first say "heading over to Bob's birthday party, meet you there?"
99zeus99 0
r u sure it was ur dad? maybe it was paco the pool guy
FeelinFine 1
Dealing with this scenario takes a lot of sensivity. 1. Open the door on her side. 2. Kick her out of the car. 3. Drive away. 4. Tell your dad that she's a bitch and you were picking her up from one of her lovers.
tnlander 20
phone sex threesome?
WOGBRO 6
I hear a threesome coming along.
RaVeN53 7
That's nasty n disrespectful! I would have turned the music up as loud as it can go to drown that out!
nikki9tails 3
good idea
DeadxManxWalking 27
who was at the wheel? o.o don't want an orgasming woman at the wheel
goza27 0
lmao @ 11. genius.