Today, while driving with my step mother, she attempted to have phone sex with my dad. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, my wife and I were doing it when the phone rang. She answered it, and rode me while carrying on a more than a five minute conversation with her father. FML
Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend called me and asked me if I wanted to have phone sex with her. We got into it. It took us 13 minutes to figure out my mom had been on the other line the whole time. FML
Today, I had to share a car with my dad and stepmother. My stepmother managed to get hammered at lunch and spent the hour-long car trip drunkenly mistaking the heating controls for the radio. FML
Today, I had to listen to my mother flirting on the phone with my dad's new girlfriend's ex-husband. FML
Today, I had to listen to my mom give a detailed description of her date last night to her friends via speakerphone... while I was trapped in the car with her. When I pointed out that I was still in the back seat, she scoffed and told me, "I have a sex life, deal with it." FML
Today, I went out of town with my mother-in-law. I don't know what possessed her to start questioning me about her son's and my sex life. When I told her I wasn't talking about that, she began to discuss her and my father-in-law's bedroom habits. The car ride was two hours. FML
Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML
Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say, "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML
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Top comments
ThogTheCaveman 7
While it's driving? You're right, great idea. What could possibly go wrong with getting out of a moving car? Dear God, are you trying to destroy my faith in humanity?
denvan 0
Wow your face must've been a Kodak moment.
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Comments (199)
towhomitmayconce 0
Key word-- attempted. Makes you think, huh?
audmac 0
FYL INDEED. That's awful I feel so bad for you.
trevor12345678 0
don't lie u got a boner
playboyintown 4
somehow give your dad an extra doze of viagara when they are home and I'm sure she won't ask for it anymore.
princess012 0
id feel in such an ackward position eww
Verkuzen 0
Excuse me while I go puke
NCR 0
atleast she can get some
NatandAlexrhot 6
LMAO!
Dreamcatcher619 6
I think she was attempting to have a 3 sum, this may be your only opportunity go for it!
taradylan 0
every bit of that sentence is ****** up.