Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML
Today, as things were getting hot with my girlfriend, it came up that I'm a virgin. She broke up with me. FML
Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right after I'd got the condom on, she said, "You do know this is break-up sex, right?" FML
Today, my future mother-in-law freaked out my very religious fiancé by telling him fornication is gonna send him to hell, because when I was with them in January we had sex every day for a month and she's still mad about it. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after being "pressured" into a relationship with another guy. But it's okay, she said she would think of me every time she made love to him. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after being "pressured" into a relationship with another guy. But it's okay, she said she would think of me every time she made love to him. FML
Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend. Why? She had been praying and came to the conclusion that God was telling her to leave so she could meet her soulmate. FML
Today, my date walked out on me after I told him I was devout in my beliefs, including saving myself until marriage. Apparently, meeting me at Sunday services didn’t twig him to my faith, and he actually thought religious girls were all secret sluts like in the pornos. FML
Today, I had to watch as my deeply religious mother broke out in tears of joy, as she said how happy she was that I was waiting until marriage to have sex. I didn't have the heart to tell her that my fiancé and I fucked on the first date. FML
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Top comments
marcelmg 10
Must be catholic. Can't cope with sinners, but can be sinners.
randomguy76 14
Dodged a HUGE bullet.
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Comments (166)
McKaylon 11
Completely unrelated to religion she clearly was crazy anyways
ThatHorse 15
You must be Mario because I've never seen a bigger bullet dodge there. Unless she gets pregnant...
Eyalsh 32
if you could reason with religious people, there would be no religious people. FYL.
captainsmegma 12
Tell her to go down on you and suck the Satan right out of you.
Miss_Whipped 43
This makes me think of the South Park episode where they made Christian songs. 'I want to get down on my knees and please Jesus. I want to feel his salvation all over my face.'
TJRoy 44
I wonder if she has done this with other guys? I have heard of guys who like to take virgins then dump them after they have done the deed, maybe she is a female version and has come up with this crazy story. What ever the case, you are better off without a person like that.
Calgirl415 1
I'm Catholic. Virgin or not it's your own choice, were created in the image of God so we're all good and bad. Being a virgin doesn't make you good or bad, your actions and how you treat people do. Lol but got to love being catholic sin Monday thru Saturday forgiven on Sunday and what other region has more **** base on us!
mosquito19 14
that's why God invented anal so you both be happy.
marcbjonson 7
tell her you were possessed by the devil but now you see the light. if she believes in god, she will believe anything.
gracehi 33
"if she believes in god, she will believe anything." You mean like the other 90+% of the world? BTW, capitalization is a wonderful thing.
MELKOZAR 27
Breakup sex sucks.
mark012492 4
I don't see how this is a problem.