Today, someone at my workplace yelled at me and filed a complaint for staring at them too often. I'm a lifeguard. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was fired because a patron complained that she didn't like the way I kept staring at her kids. I was a lifeguard. FML
Today, a couple yelled at me and reported me to the homeowner association for "watching them make out" at the pool. I'm the lifeguard. FML
Today, while taking part in a lifeguarding exercise, I was supposed to "drown" to get another guard to save me. After all was done, my boss called me into his office and screamed at me for "drowning the wrong way," and threatening our reputation. FML
Today, I fell asleep while lifeguarding, thinking I could get away with it due to my sunglasses. When I woke up, I saw my boss waving at me. Apparently she'd been trying to get my attention for five minutes. FML
Today, I saved a woman from drowning at a pool where I lifeguard, but when I got her out of the water she started screaming about sexual assault. Apparently I accidentally brushed her breasts when pulling her up and out of the water. She wants to sue me. FML
Today, while I was at the beach I decided to go into the ocean even though the waves looked rough. While I was in the water, I got caught by the riptide and needed to be saved. The reason I was at the beach? I'm a lifeguard. Now all my co-workers won't stop laughing at me. FML
Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML
Today, I was fired from my job. I was a lifeguard and the other day a 30 year-old man who only spoke Spanish hit on me. I'm 16 and I'd politely rejected him. He then went to the front desk and told them how I tried molesting him in the locker room. FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to post a sign at the deep end of the public swimming pool, saying, "This end topless only." When someone complained, he said that I did it, and I got banned from the pool for life. And fired, too - I was the lifeguard. FML
Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML
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Top comments
sirpantselot 22
They seem to have spent an ironically long time looking at you...
Original_Outcast 23
No miss I wasn't staring at your breasts, I was making sure you weren't drowning!
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Comments (64)
kabza 13
im assuming OP wasnt wearing any uniform of some sort. coz i'd also get freaked out if some stranger stared at me for years.
ShawnBushOG 9
if you're a legit lifeguard then you're wearing a uniform
kyu_Q 19
And sometimes sitting in the high hair. Your bosses backed you up......right?
ShawnBushOG 9
Obviously none of you guys are certified lifeguards, if you think that person(s) is a distressed swimmer you pay slightly more attention than regular.. lol
doodlecloud 27
'none of you guys'? Most people here have commented FYL, not YDI....who are you talking to?
kabza 13
I hope the person who complained gets attacked by a jelly fish :)
Futacy 30
In Colorado? Nah bruh.
rg350dx 29
Ma'am. I noticed your breasts were drowning from across the pool. Please remove your top so I can proceed with CPR and mouth to nipple
klovemachine 24
Win :)
zombieslayer83 19
Careful, if her breast are too big, you might be the one drowning.
stormchaser24 24
Get a pair of sunglasses, so they can't tell if you are staring at them.
yepusuckarse 7
Come to think of it.... Most lifeguards are required to wear shades for this reason... I didn't find it creepy, though, til just now
daydreamer244 13
There are too many stupid people on this earth..
samkit 14
nop
Enslaved 38
"Watching as the frilly panties run." "Agualung" is now playing in my head. (: I'm curious if that person complaining was actually in water and if the OP was able to contain his erection? :P
Quizzical 8
Clearly OP wasn't told that a good lifeguard stares upwards so as not to unsettle anyone who might swim past their view, and only responds to direct calls of "someone's drowning!"
Silly_Lilly6969 23
I hope your boss or supervisor isn't stupid enough to fire you for doing your job