Today, a couple yelled at me and reported me to the homeowner association for "watching them make out" at the pool. I'm the lifeguard. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, someone at my workplace yelled at me and filed a complaint for staring at them too often. I'm a lifeguard. FML
Today, I was fired because a patron complained that she didn't like the way I kept staring at her kids. I was a lifeguard. FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to post a sign at the deep end of the public swimming pool, saying, "This end topless only." When someone complained, he said that I did it, and I got banned from the pool for life. And fired, too - I was the lifeguard. FML
Today, I was verbally and physically attacked in a public pool, because I was swimming in what a grandma claimed was her part of the pool. Since I'm a very tolerant person, I calmly tried to talk some reason into the elderly lady. The lifeguard had to come to protect me. FML
Today, I saved a woman from drowning at a pool where I lifeguard, but when I got her out of the water she started screaming about sexual assault. Apparently I accidentally brushed her breasts when pulling her up and out of the water. She wants to sue me. FML
Today, while lifeguarding, a kid thought it'd be hilarious to take a crap in the pool. The other kids freaked out and rushed to get out. Several of them slipped on the way out and hurt themselves fairly badly. Two parents are now threatening to sue us, and my boss blames me. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Today, I was fired from my job. I was a lifeguard and the other day a 30 year-old man who only spoke Spanish hit on me. I'm 16 and I'd politely rejected him. He then went to the front desk and told them how I tried molesting him in the locker room. FML
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Top comments
ThatIsSoFetch 7
What do they expect when they're making out in a public place?
123765 18
what's seriously wrong with people these days
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Comments (18)
123765 18
what's seriously wrong with people these days
Akitakat 31
It's not just "these days"...its been like this for a long time. Many just aren't aware.
Glowworm56 27
"Sir, and lady making out, please get a room!"
ThatIsSoFetch 7
What do they expect when they're making out in a public place?
Lalala579121 28
A public place where it's someone's job to watch people, no less.
Lobby_Bee 18
Was it hot?
RichardPencil 32
If your swim trunks showed your enthusiasm for their activity, they do have a valid point.
White19 13
Lol no
NostalgiaFreak9 43
Tell them not to flatter themselves and to carry on.
yeongji 31
It seems to me that they wanted their "5 seconds of fame" from making out to last longer by dragging an innocent bystander into their mess. Sorry to hear what happened, OP.
Lalala579121 28
Well they've gotta do something to spice up their romantic life. They probably can't make other activities last longer than 5 seconds.
electrodude 15
So next time you're on duty and something happens to them look the other way
olga_crvjl 19
Lmao omg I can't ??
NostalgiaFreak9 43
You can't what? You have to finish your sentence.
thatslifeiguess7 16
Maybe blowing your whistle gave the wrong impression?