Today, I realized that I am so sexually deprived that I get aroused when plugging my headphones into my computer. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I'm so sexually deprived that I got a raging hard-on from seeing and hearing my coworker yawn. FML
Today, I'm so sexually deprived, I got a boner from undressing a mannequin at work. FML
Today, I took advantage of the fact that my wife was sleeping to watch porn on my computer. I put headphones on so that she wouldn't hear, but It wasn't until she came out of the bedroom that I realised I hadn't plugged them in properly. FML
Today, I realized how sex-deprived I am when the thought of owning condoms gave me a rock-solid erection. FML
Today, I sat in the bathroom on my phone to rub one out after a long day. Wanting to hear the action, I upped the volume until the sound was low enough for me to hear, despite the volume being near max. I continued until I realized my phone was connected to my headset outside near my family. FML
Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML
Today, I realized that I'm so depressed that I can't even watch porn without getting upset about how I can't get laid. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of my dad blasting porn on his computer. FML
Today, I realized I masturbate too much when I got turned on by the smell of my shampoo. FML
Today, I'm so deprived of female attention that I got a hard-on when a nurse told me I have beautiful veins. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
kings1fan 6
Imagine how she feels when she fills her gas tank up!
rattusrattus 19
Tip from your Auntie* Rattie - buy a vibrator and some lube. You can get them online if you feel embarressed going into a shop. *Auntie being metaphorical in this case, not indicative of actual relation.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (122)
br0ccoli 15
Women don't have a hard time getting sex if they really want it. Guys are 98% of the time receptive to get some action even from strangers. If you are getting turned on by inanimate objects, I'd say this is a good option. Go get em tiger! (or get a vibrator)
j_cat187 20
Wouldn't want if it's too easy.
AntiLove187 4
Yall are ******* retarded.
KiddNYC1O 22
A lot of us guys feel that way when revving our sports cars.
mboehm88 3
Well you see...when a man loves a woman very much...
tklone329 0
MIND ******!:]
Calyx_fml 22
What happens when you plug it in and pull it out over and over?
hateevryone 15
You need to get laid....bigtime *stewie's voice*
C0N71NG3NCY 6
You could try to lose some weight and stop acting like you're 16 and "oh so cute", that might help. Be proactive!
tbuscariollo 2
I literally laughed out loud
silentblack 0
So u need somebody to download their hard drive into ur software.